tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-89642158969878738032024-03-23T15:43:53.067+05:30VishipediaVishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.comBlogger137125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-49688766507620112872016-01-25T09:49:00.001+05:302016-01-25T12:24:55.972+05:30Remember This When Life Throws You A Curveball<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">I requested the instructor to let me do a few light exercises and stretches. I had two bowls of banana chips before hitting the gym that day (yes I know, I got carried away).</span></div>
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<span class="s1">He had other ideas.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Forty five minutes, 25 burpees, 40 pushups, 200 mountain runs, infinite squats, jumping jacks and skipping jumps later, I crawled out of the gym on my butt. Sweat dripped from my eyebrows and my t-shirt was soaking wet. The air beautifully cool and refreshing. I generally love this feeling after a workout. Only, today I was ready to puke.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Somehow, I got to my feet and sat on the stairs. The banana chips were at war with my throat, and would win the battle any minute. Survival of the toughest. Or is it fittest? I can’t remember.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The instructor joined me. “What happened?” he asked. I revolved my palm in front of my chest indicating that I wanted to throw up.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Don’t worry, hang in there for a few minutes,” he said. “It will be okay.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">"I will feel better if I puke", I used my hands to tell him.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">"Nope, just hang in there. Breathe."</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Five minutes later, I was back on my feet, and back in the gym for an awesome session of stretching. I didn’t throw up.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Often (rather almost every time), life throws a curveball at us. Where we err is in giving up or giving in too early. Things are not dismal as they appear. Trust me. Yes, they go bad, but they’re just detours. And a detour does not mean that we stop our journey or turn back. It simply means that the journey might take us longer. Might as well enjoy our time on the way because we could experience something beautiful.</span></div>
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My neighbor sums it up brilliantly when she says, “Our mind wants to feel important. If something good occurs, it perches on Cloud 9. On the other hand, if something bad occurs, it makes us feel like the world will collapse on us.”<span class="s1"></span></div>
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<span class="s1">Hang in there. Too many people don’t know how close they were to their goals when they gave up. In the end, it will be okay.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Nothing is as good, or as bad, as our mind makes it. The biggest problem with life is the image in our mind of how it is ‘supposed to be’. It’s okay to want life to be a certain way, but it’s also okay to be okay with how life turns out. Because in the end, everything will be okay.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Yes, sometimes, life takes really really ugly turns. At such times, remember what Steve Jobs said: “You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span class="s2"><a href="https://www.themuse.com/advice/9-everyday-decisions-that-will-make-or-break-your-career">Jeff Haden writes</a></span>, “Perspective always clears away the fog. When we look forward, the path seems uncertain and the future unpredictable. When we look back, all the dots seem to connect.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The darkest hours of your life right will teach you valuable lessons. They will make you stronger, unless you are the ‘<i>must-hold-on-firmly-to-my-past</i>’ type. I speak from experience. Every painful event in my life - which I felt I could never recover from - has made me better. In fact, the biggest blunder I committed (more on that a few years later) put me on the path to entrepreneurship, something I had been putting off for years.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b>The wound is the place where the light enters you. - Rumi</b></span></blockquote>
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Remember, dear friend, that whatever happens today will be okay. Just have faith and hang in there. Don’t give up on hope or on your life.<span class="s1"></span><br />
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I would love to hear your thoughts. Do share them with me on <a href="http://twitter.com/vishipedia" target="_blank">Twitter</a> or <a href="http://facebook.com/vishalskataria" target="_blank">Facebook</a>. </div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-16543285997987387732016-01-19T08:29:00.000+05:302016-01-19T08:29:27.730+05:30Why India Lost to Australia Again<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">Australia beat India 3-0 yet again. Many of us knew that <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/04/why-india-was-beaten-by-australia-in.html" target="_blank">this would happen</a>. But India fought harder than expected, which made me happy. The question is: Why, despite our best efforts, did Australia beat us in each match? Some incidents offered insights.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">In the first ODI, Australia had to chase more than 300 runs on a ground where the record was about 280. India were favorites at the innings break. But by the 20th over of the Aussie innings, I had a strong feeling that India would lose if a wicket didn’t fall in the next 10 overs. </span>When they didn’t send the ball to the boundary ropes, Smith and Bailey kept running singles and twos like they were playing box cricket.</div>
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<span class="s1">“Stop the singles, Dhoni… stop the singles!” one side of my mind pleaded to the Indian skipper.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“How?”, asked the other. (This was a ‘Captain Jack Sparrow’ moment where I was sandwiched between two opinions and agreed with both of them.)</span></div>
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<span class="s1">In the third one-day, Smith hit the ball to midwicket. It fell short of Rahane, bounced off his palms and spun away to his right. Smith ran a single. It’s normal, right? Players from every team ‘misfield’ when half a chance is missed.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">But does this ‘tough misfield’ occur with the Aussies? Nope. Even if a ball falls short, it lands firmly in their palms, and the fielders are instantly ready to have a shy at the stumps.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Let’s look deeper. The Aussies have won 18 games in a row at home now (including their unbeaten streak in Australia during the World Cup. Remember how comprehensively they beat they Black Caps in the World Cup final?). Their level of cricket in domestic tournaments is far higher than that in most international matches. How do they develop this mental resilience and excellence? Automation.</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image Source: <a href="http://www.espncricinfo.com/australia-v-india-2015-16/content/story/963111.html?" target="_blank">ESPNCricInfo</a></td></tr>
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<span class="s1">Tony Dungy, the coach of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers - the most hopeless football team in 1996 - didn’t believe that they needed the thickest playbook to win. They didn’t need to memorize hundreds of formations. They just needed to memorize a few key moves and get them right every time. Using these moves, the Bucs went on to win the Super Bowl. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">In the army, basic training teaches soldiers how to shoot, think, and communicate under fire. The entire organization relies on routines for building bases, setting strategic priorities, and deciding how to respond to attacks… all of which are rehearsed to the point of automation.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">This <b>automation</b> can be understood better by a word we are familiar with: <b>habit</b>.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">A habit is formed when an action is repeated till it becomes automated. Take brushing your teeth for example. Do we think while brushing? Or take driving. When we learn driving, we think so much before changing lanes that even bicyclists overtake us. We keep thinking about the distance from the car in front and the one behind, keep checking whether we are too close to the curb; a honking vehicle makes us nervous and so on. But once our hands are set at the wheel, we smoothly maneuver through traffic, instinctively know when to overtake and when to pull our foot off the gas pedal… all this while processing mounds of information in split seconds.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">We become good drivers when driving becomes a habit. The same concept is applicable for everything - writing, exercising, cooking, coding, sports and what have you.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The Bucs ingrained the key formations in their minds till those became habits. Soldiers develop habits to shoot, think and communicate. Victory on the field (in sports and in battle) depends upon which side takes rational decisions more swiftly.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The Aussies have made running hard a habit (while batting and fielding). It’s not unusual to see three fielders converging on a ball and none of them colliding; in fact, they back each other up brilliantly. Their bowlers fixate on their strengths and stick to them, clinically chipping away at batsmen’s patience. Their batsmen… well… they are so strong mentally that they dominate any bowling attack. The quick running further adds to the pressure on bowlers.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">However, you would notice that even the Aussies start making silly mistakes - playing reckless strokes, misfielding, bowling loose balls - when they are under pressure. Why? Because they are thinking, they are second guessing.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">When we start thinking, we lose our advantage. Try this in anything you do. As long what you comes naturally, it's easy. But when you start thinking, doubts appear and they hinder your performance.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/10/5-awesome-qualities-of-ms-dhoni_6.html" target="_blank">Dhoni</a>, for instance, developed a reputation as the world’s best finisher when he knew that batsmen who followed could hold the innings together. But when Jadeja, Raina and Yuvraj lost their form, Dhoni started playing cautiously. He started thinking, and that, slowly but surely, impacted his ability. When he knows his bowlers will perform well, he simply rotates them like a wizard. But when they are all over the place, he starts thinking. That leads to him missing a trick or two, like he did in the third ODI against Maxwell.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">We have more advocates for words than for action. While the former (including yours truly) keep thinking and ‘pondering’, the latter keep doing. Guess who gets better at what they do.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">We are obsessed with having ten things to do, and keep discussing how we can add to that list. The list grows longer, and at the end of hour-long discussions we ask, “Okay, so what is the final agenda?” Then we are so overwhelmed that we complain about <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2016/01/stop-saying-i-dont-have-time-youre.html" target="_blank">not having time</a>. The doers, on the other hand, do just 3-5 things, but achieve remarkable results. And yes, the Chinese bamboo takes 5 years to grow an inch more than a tiny sapling. Patience is an integral part of habit formation, but so is persistence.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Every time you have a doubt which shouldn’t exist, it is because of lack of action. So trying to do more. Throw the spaghetti at the wall and see what sticks. Once you are done trying various things, stick to the ones which have provided best results and ignore the rest. Get as awesome at the task as the Aussies at fielding. Then, you can move on to the next one.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">When the Indian cricket team imbibes this fundamental in itself, it will win the World Cup again.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-11839079760216995392016-01-04T08:26:00.003+05:302016-01-04T11:37:44.894+05:30Stop Saying "I Don't Have Time". You're Lying to Yourself<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">“We must do it,” he said as I popped open a beer.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The meeting with a potential client (who, incidentally, was a friend) had been stressful. He held high expectations from us on a project, but was unwilling to cooperate. “Why should I pay you if I have to work on it,” he argued. I tried explaining his significance in the larger scheme of things, but he turned more indignant.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“We’ll get back to you tomorrow,” I said purely to end the meeting.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">When my friend and I sat for lunch (and beer), he suggested that we should accept the project. I opposed. It wasn’t our area of expertise, nor was it something that we wanted to foray into. It would waste our time. “<i>Nahi yaar, wo dost hai</i>. <i>Karte hein </i>(he's a friend. Let's do it for him)<i>.</i>” he said. So we discussed what to do. I was to email some people and he would get in touch with one of his contacts.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Three days passed and I heard nothing. So I called him and asked if he spoke to his contact. “<i>Nahi yaar</i>, I didn’t find the time. Plus, it is not something that I want to get into.” I went into the kitchen, stopped the maid from washing the frying pan, took it, and whacked myself on the head.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">My friend’s U-turns are nothing new. He would joke that nobody does U-turns like him. Then Arvind Kejriwal took away the only thing he could brag about. The man just <a href="http://satyavijayi.com/arvind-kejriwal-hypocrite/" target="_blank">can’t let anyone be happy</a>.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">But this post is not about U-turns. It is about our eternal shortage of time. A shortage which is self-induced.</span></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Gc5VvvGv-u8/VoneZOcr2_I/AAAAAAAAC6k/8tVXlPcFXH4/s1600/Tim%2BFerriss%2BLack%2Bof%2BTime.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="301" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Gc5VvvGv-u8/VoneZOcr2_I/AAAAAAAAC6k/8tVXlPcFXH4/s640/Tim%2BFerriss%2BLack%2Bof%2BTime.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1">In the <a href="http://www.amazon.in/4-Hour-Work-Week-Escape-Anywhere/dp/0091929113/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1451875276&sr=1-1&keywords=four+hour+work+week" target="_blank">Four-Hour Workweek</a> (a bloody awesome book), Tim Ferriss wrote:</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><i>A lack of time is a lack of priorities.</i></b></span></blockquote>
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<span class="s1">It is undoubtedly the most insightful productivity or life-hacking advice we can receive. But I believe that a deeper layer exists.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Our ability to prioritize (or lack thereof) stems from the fear of missing out (FOMO).</span></div>
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<span class="s1">A <a href="http://www.jwtintelligence.com/production/FOMO_JWT_TrendReport_May2011.pdf"><span class="s2">JWT survey reported</span></a> that FOMO affects 70% adults. I am one of them. I have said no to party invites and felt deep urges to call my friends at the party and ask what they are doing. I see Instagram and Facebook photos and feel pangs of jealousy. While my friends are busy biking, eating and boozing, getting married and probably enjoying sex, I sit in front of a computer, or read a book.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Despite that, I have little to complain about. I don’t feel bogged down by Monday Blues (quite the contrary), I am not hounded on phone by someone if I’m out late at night, I don’t feel stressed by pending work… Life is good despite experiencing FOMO.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Why? Because I say “No”. And if you want to make time to do what you truly love, you also must use this dreaded word.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">So, to the important question: for whom and what should you utter the word, sending those around you into a frenzy?</span></div>
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<b>1. People</b></div>
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<span class="s1">“We often do what others expect us to do and end up feeling resentful”, wrote Purba Ray in response to a comment <a href="http://www.purba-ray.com/2015/12/the-loneliness-of-connected_14.html"><span class="s2">in this post</span></a>. Succinct and poignant. You nodded, right? But………</span></div>
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We would rather be strapped to a chair while someone claws their nails on a blackboard than say “no” to others. According to <a href="http://bohns.socialpsychology.org/"><span class="s2">Vanessa Bohns</span></a>, this is because “it feels threatening to our relationships and feeling of connectedness. As a result, we bend over backwards to accommodate last-minute demands of people, and feel pained if they do not reciprocate.”</div>
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So, I request you to do something drastic - say “no” to everyone. A “No” does not hurt feelings. Most people don’t take it as badly as we think they will. “Chances are, the consequences of saying ‘no’ are much worse in our heads than in reality," Bohns says.</div>
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The effect is two-fold. One, you free up time for yourself and can focus on what your heart truly desires. Two, you will identify people who deserve to be in your life. People who want to be with you won’t mind you denying their requests. And those who are offended don’t deserve your time or effort. (Discretion in the professional space is recommended though.)</div>
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<b>2. Your mobile phone</b></div>
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<span class="s1">Rand Fishkin <a href="https://twitter.com/randfish/status/678639616199557120"><span class="s2">tweeted</span></a> that the “mobile isn't killing desktop (sic), it's killing all our free time.” We can’t stop checking our mobile phones because something awesome may happen. Whatever occurs will barely impact our lives. But FOMO is ingrained in us, remember? The only thing clutter-free thing today is the Notifications tab in our phones.</span></div>
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Turn the internet on your phone off. Put your phone on silent at a restaurant, café, or theatre. <a href="http://lifehacker.com/make-the-first-person-to-check-their-phone-at-dinner-pa-1443397515"><span class="s2">Play this game</span></a> at such places. Use your hands to applaud the performance of a band or exquisite presentation of a dish instead of clicking a photo. Reach out for a glass of water instead of your mobile phone in the morning. And give yourself some time before you check for network as soon as an airplane lands.</div>
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It will be weird, not only for you but for others also. Not checking your phone will mean that you will notice things around you. If someone looks up from his phone and spots you doing so, he may think that you are a terrorist. Maybe he will make you feel like one too. But that’s okay. Just say “no” to your phone and within a few days, you will feel human again. Plus you will have a lot of free time to do what you want to.</div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--fHDHOoWZcA/VonddtYgfVI/AAAAAAAAC6c/y_YW-R5BfLo/s1600/No%2BTime%2BCoffee.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/--fHDHOoWZcA/VonddtYgfVI/AAAAAAAAC6c/y_YW-R5BfLo/s400/No%2BTime%2BCoffee.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b>3. Busyness</b></div>
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<span class="s1">I came across this remarkable insight by <a href="http://alexvermeer.com/a-lack-of-time-is-a-lack-of-priorities/"><span class="s2">Alex Vermeer</span></a>. Instead of rephrasing, I’ll just let him say it again:</span></div>
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‘Problems with busyness arise when we feel like victims. “Gawd, if only I wasn’t so busy I would do xyz instead.” But, if it’s actually more important, why not do that instead. And if it’s not as important, stop stressing over not doing it!’</blockquote>
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It’s a surprisingly simple idea. It’s also incredibly difficult to practice.</div>
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We wear busyness like a badge. We fear being labeled as lazy if we are not busy. Scrambling to tick boxes off our checklist so that we can complain (in a humblebragging sort of way) about how busy we are… it gives us a rush. But guess what - it’s not being busy that counts. It’s what you do while being busy that does.</div>
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So the next time you say that you are overloaded with work, know that it is an excuse. If you truly prioritize something - work, play, hobbies, family, relationships - you will always make time for it. You just have to want it bad enough.<br />
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-eO5lIxh1SgE/VooMIjYoaHI/AAAAAAAAC7A/xLNjkO1orw4/s1600/Youll-Find-an-Excuse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="255" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-eO5lIxh1SgE/VooMIjYoaHI/AAAAAAAAC7A/xLNjkO1orw4/s400/Youll-Find-an-Excuse.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b>4. Urgency</b></div>
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<span class="s1">The pathetic corporate culture has seeped into every aspect of our lives. Everything feels urgent today, creating anxiety and making it further difficult to focus on a task (as if smartphones weren’t enough). Regard for self goes out the window and is replaced by ‘getting more done’ and ‘<a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/01/3-things-einstein-taught-me-about.html" target="_blank">fire-fighting</a>’.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LjIVCbYsIUg/VonfveT3D2I/AAAAAAAAC6w/_AfcOgZ-79c/s1600/Important%2BUrgent.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LjIVCbYsIUg/VonfveT3D2I/AAAAAAAAC6w/_AfcOgZ-79c/s400/Important%2BUrgent.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></div>
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There is the urgent, and there is the important. Unfortunately, we have switched the meanings. To realize the difference, leave lots of white space in your calendar. <a href="http://liveyourlegend.net/warren-buffetts-5-step-process-for-prioritizing-true-success-and-why-most-people-never-do-it/"><span class="s2">Warren Buffet recommends</span></a> that you list out the five most important goals of your life. Then, don’t put the others on the back burner, ignore them completely. Gradually, your time will be filled doing things and meeting people that matter. Slowly but steadily, you will focus on aspects which are important and trash those which are not.</div>
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<span class="s1">This sounds frightening in the beginning. But if you truly feel stressed because of lack of time, all I ask of you is to try these steps <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/12/i-am-conducting-experiment-on-myself.html" target="_blank">for 21 days</a>. And then enjoy the relief of being able to disconnect from inconsequential tasks, and the joy of indulging in those you truly love. After all, you deserve happiness in your life as much as everyone, don’t you?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">How do you make time for what you like to do?</span><br />
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<span class="s1" style="font-size: x-small;">Images: <a href="http://images.google.com/" target="_blank">Google</a></span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-14970295504778479882015-12-25T13:45:00.002+05:302015-12-26T07:35:16.760+05:30Why We Will Keep Hearing "Humara Kuch Nahi Ho Sakta"<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">Modi should do this, Jaitley should do that. The government should do this, the judiciary should do that. Businessmen should do this, Bollywoodsters should do that. Dhoni should do this, Saina (not Raina) should do that. India should do this, Pakistan should do that.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Swacch Bharat Abhiyan will fail because Modi does not put in effort. Corruption will not be eradicated because Kejriwal’s honesty is being questioned (LOL!). Crime rates will not fall because the police does not care about the law. News channels will never sell honest news because they simply care about ratings and money.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">"Swacch Bharat Abhiyan is novel idea", I tell my friend. But Modi is not doing enough to make it a success. He simply wanted to make the headlines - that attention-seeking globetrotter (by the way, <a href="http://www.dhakkanz.com/social-accounts-pm-modi-rtis-9-questions/" target="_blank">here are some facts</a> about his trips and devices). While saying this, I pop a chocolate in my mouth and throw the wrapper on the street. “<i>Iss desh ka kuch nahi ho sakta</i>,” I lisp while savoring the chocolate.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I want people to read my blog posts, share them, comment on them, and make me a star. But I will not engage with other bloggers. I will not write something that people like to read. I will write mediocre posts purely for myself and expect people to discover my posts and swoon over them. I will reciprocate only to people who engage with me first. And I will call popular bloggers snooty because they do not praise my writing.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I want the government to build better roads and flyovers. But when they are built, I will drive on the wrong side to avoid the 5 additional seconds added to my travel time because the route. If I accidentally get on a flyover, I will reverse rather than take the longer route - inconvenience caused to traffic be damned. As a pedestrian, I want vehicles to stop for me. But even when I see them coming at high speeds, I will cross the road, mentally challenging them not to slow down. Let's see who blinks first.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I want people (family, colleagues, subordinates, domestic help) to listen to me, but I will talk to them like a jerk. I will behave like a self-professed know-it-all, without even an iota of achievement to my name.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I want… I demand… I want… I demand…</span></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-P54eoIqQxJM/Vn31wBV6LmI/AAAAAAAAC5Y/FZ-hjw9HfYg/s1600/Change.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="498" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-P54eoIqQxJM/Vn31wBV6LmI/AAAAAAAAC5Y/FZ-hjw9HfYg/s640/Change.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1">My friend, when will you start doing something? Every change starts from within.</span><br />
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<span class="s1">Added luxuries have made us more cocky and stubborn. We want conditions around us to improve without our quality of life being affected in the tiniest way. Not everyone can be pleased every time. Sometimes you lose a little, sometimes others do. All of it contributes to the bigger picture of inclusive growth - in your family, at work, or in your country. We know this, but still behave like street dogs. By being pig-headed in compromise, we stifle growth in society. We may be happy to have got what we wanted, but it hurts us in the long run. By demanding that others do what we want the way we want it, we display entitlement and selfishness, compromising humanity along the way. Then we complain that humanity is dead.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Change starts with you. And it doesn't have to be a turnaround in life that we have come to associate the word with. Can you cross the road quickly, or wait a few seconds for the vehicle to pass to ensure that it is not inconvenienced? Can you place an empty Bisleri bottle or chips wrapper in your bag, or throw it in a dustbin when you find one, rather than littering on the road and complaining that there is no dustbin around? Can you be kind to a stranger who can do nothing for you? Can you be respectful of other people without expecting them to reciprocate? Can you calm your mind when it is clamoring about daily events the most? Yes. Will you? That's a different question.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Like <a href="http://theerailivedin.com/" target="_blank">My Era</a>, I'll leave you with a song. I hope you start with the Man in the Mirror and ask him to change his ways.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">R.I.P. Michael. God knows we need you more than ever today.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-76238829185007653782015-12-17T08:42:00.000+05:302015-12-17T08:42:15.237+05:30#My21DayChallenge - Week 1 Update<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">This comes pretty quickly, close on the heels of <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/12/i-am-conducting-experiment-on-myself.html" target="_blank">the previous post</a>, but today marks the 8th day of <a href="https://twitter.com/search?f=tweets&vertical=default&q=%23my21daychallenge&src=typd" target="_blank">#my21daychallenge</a>. Here are some details on what has transpired in the last 7 days:</span></div>
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<span class="s1">6 activities are part of the challenge, or experiment, or rather adventure, as friends mentioned in comments of the previous post. Here is how they went:</span></div>
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<b>Meet friends - 6 hours:</b> I met Purvesh, Rakesh (technically, he is not a friend but someone far more knowledgeable) and Amit, a remarkably talented painter. Each experience was refreshing. Purvesh asked me uncomfortable questions, the answers of which have helped me set a goal for the next two years. Rakesh gave me tips to progress in an area where I was stuck. And Amit… well… his paintings floored me. I must meet more people this week.<br /></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-i2nBsspF-T0/VnImHwh8mwI/AAAAAAAAC4A/bT8EvLgOpIE/s1600/Purvesh%2BSelfie.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-i2nBsspF-T0/VnImHwh8mwI/AAAAAAAAC4A/bT8EvLgOpIE/s320/Purvesh%2BSelfie.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">With Purvesh</td></tr>
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<b>Exercise - 5 hours:</b> Mission accomplished.<br /><br /></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tSzUvMtrDkQ/VnIm4JR6c5I/AAAAAAAAC4U/iDIKgccKdlQ/s1600/Yoga.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tSzUvMtrDkQ/VnIm4JR6c5I/AAAAAAAAC4U/iDIKgccKdlQ/s320/Yoga.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b>Read - 7 hours:</b> I think I have exceeded the preset time here. I completed reading Success Sutra and have started reading The Power of Habit again. Trust me, if you want to write a non-fiction book, use The Power of Habit as a benchmark.<br /><br /></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tTwxSvimJsU/VnInI4kvk2I/AAAAAAAAC4Y/5pSVzpILfSQ/s1600/Success%2BSutras.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="237" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tTwxSvimJsU/VnInI4kvk2I/AAAAAAAAC4Y/5pSVzpILfSQ/s320/Success%2BSutras.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<b>New Experiences - 4 hours:</b> I have been lagging here. I heard some music from Winery Dogs and saw <a href="https://www.facebook.com/K1llustrator/?fref=ts" target="_blank">Amit's paintings</a>. His portrayal of Gaya when the world ended is breathtaking (the painting in the centre of the image). I must spend more time in this. I will be at the Comic Con this Saturday. If you are around, come say hi.<br /></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cwdUZ3ZXdk4/VnImUPAFlFI/AAAAAAAAC4I/IA4b7kJdXuw/s1600/Shiobi.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-cwdUZ3ZXdk4/VnImUPAFlFI/AAAAAAAAC4I/IA4b7kJdXuw/s320/Shiobi.jpg" width="237" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Some of Amit's paintings</td></tr>
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<b>Waste Time - 14 hours</b>: This is a goal which I feel I have exceeded. Social media again sucked me into its trap - I simply couldn’t find the guts to activate the SelfControl app. I also tend to switch on the idiot box during meals, because of which my meals get extended and time gets wasted… time that could be invested elsewhere. I think focus (or the lack, thereof) is the biggest problem here.</div>
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<li style="text-align: justify;"><b>Sleep - 50 hours:</b> I need no motivation here. Probably have exceeded this target too (sorry, no photo of me sleeping).</li>
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<span class="s1">Some challenges I am facing are:</span></div>
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Not being able to document my activities well. I currently write in my diary, which is not an efficient way to go about it. Sometimes I forget, sometimes I don’t carry the diary along… I must look for an app which helps me keep a tab of my tasks in a simpler way. Do you have any suggestions?</div>
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Some of my tasks coincide. For instance, watching TV while eating meals is a combination of wasting time and time for eating food. When I met a friend at The Li’l Flea, it was a combination of meeting friends and new experiences. Need to figure that out.</div>
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<li style="text-align: justify;">Motivation is not high.</li>
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<span style="text-align: justify;">I don’t feel a conspicuous difference in me. Then again, I have not done things too differently from what I did previously. Let us see how this week progresses.</span></div>
Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-57104076063759096292015-12-14T07:49:00.003+05:302015-12-14T07:49:37.922+05:30I am Conducting an Experiment on Myself<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">Recently, I tried to revive a music project with a friend.“I would love to, dude,” he said. “But I don’t have time.” He is not the only one faces this challenge. Many people say: “I would love to [insert activity] if only I had time.” Some of the activities include rest. I shudder to think that some people are so busy that they have no time to rest. In fact, I have started feeling like I am lazier than I thought, because I rarely am, if ever, hard pressed for time.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Then again, the bias of the mind is such that it overestimates everything it does. I thought that my ‘time management’ techniques were note-worthy, that people should learn from me. And so I thought of writing a blog post titled ‘<i>6 More Things to Do When You Don’t Have Time</i>’.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Interesting paradox, isn’t it?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I jotted down six ‘activities’ for people to do when they feel like they don’t have time. Then came doubts. This would be another boring, preachy, ‘knowledge dispersing’ post where the adage ‘those who can’t do, teach” would ring true. Some readers would appreciate it, the vast majority would ignore it, and the post would be forgotten within one day of being published. So I thought of taking it one step further.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I would try it on myself first.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I don’t suffer from dearth of time largely because I ignore irrelevant things (almost everything, actually), and because of a poor, virtually non existent, social life (my friends will vouch for that).</span></div>
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<span class="s1">It worked wonders for me in the last year. I amassed a lot of knowledge in this period, reading articles online and trying things out, some of which worked while others didn’t. I have learned by getting my hands dirty, something that I could not do in the corporate world.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">But I have hit a brick wall now. My ability of <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2013/05/5-steps-on-how-to-kiss.html" target="_blank">keeping things simple</a> has been compromised, and so has my penchant for staying calm. I am stuck in a rut and my perspectives are restricted because I barely meet people. I have begun talking too much, pushing forth my points rather than trying to understand the person in front. I have started thinking that I know what is best for others. I have become lazy and complacent, and have procrastinated on an important project for over a year.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">These are not my best days.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I have two choices to address this predicament: I can either wallow in self pity and blame circumstances, or I can fix it. I choose the former.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Just kidding, I choose the latter.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Here is the deal. I am conducting a 21-day experiment on myself (which started on 10th December) and will share the results with you. It takes 21 days to form a new habit, and I will try to form more than one in them.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">There are 168 hours in a week. Below are the six activities, and the tentative amount of time that I will spend on them each week.</span></div>
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<li><b>Meet friends</b> <b>- 6 hours:</b> The people who say “What? You’re crazy!”, don’t count as friends. The ones who say “You’re crazy and I love it”, do. So I will meet more of the latter. Hopefully I will upload more Facebook and Instagram-worthy photos, or at least be tagged in some.<br /></li>
<li><b>Exercise</b> <b>- 5 hours:</b> I already exercise this much each week, so this shouldn’t be difficult to manage.<br /></li>
<li><b>Read - 7 hours:</b> I read so much online that I have been ignoring good books which have shaped my thinking. I’m going to return to reading, with the aim of covering at least 20 pages a day.<br /></li>
<li><b>New Experiences - 4 hours:</b> This includes listening to and making new music, attending conferences and exhibitions (if applicable) and anything else which plunges me into something new.<br /></li>
<li><b>Waste Time - 14 hours:</b> Time spent on social media and in front of the idiot box (even news and sports) is time wasted. I will try to waste 6 hours between Monday and Friday, and 14 on weekends.<br /><br />Reading useful articles will not be considered wasting time, nor will doing household chores so that mom stops complaining about me being unmarried and her ‘not having a helping hand around the house’.<br /></li>
<li><b>Sleep - 50 hours:</b> A minimum of 7 hours each day.</li>
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<span class="s1">These sum up to 87 hours, which means I am left with 81 hours each week to work, complete household chores, eat food and travel for meetings. I’m thinking that should be enough.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">How did I come up with these numbers? I don’t know. I’m just shooting from the hip. These numbers are not carved in stone. As I mentioned before, they are tentative. Plus, I’m still working on efficiently keeping track of this.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">This experiment is not to see how much I work. It’s about evolving as a person. I believe that meeting encouraging people and exposing myself to new experiences will motivate me to do what is important, that reading will improve my writing and thinking, and seeing that I have only 81 hours a week to complete whatever I want to will make me more productive.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I could have started today, right? It’s Monday, the beginning of a new week. But I started on 10th December. The end of the experiment will coincide with 31st December, the end of 2015. On 1st January, 2016, I will have the results to share with you. And yes, I will keep tweeting about stuff with the hashtag <a href="https://twitter.com/search?f=tweets&vertical=default&q=%23my21daychallenge&src=typd" target="_blank">#my21daychallenge</a>. (It’s an old hashtag but nobody is currently using it. So why reinvent the wheel?) Engage with the hashtag and share your encouragement, insights, criticism or anything that you feel will help me.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Now, there are two choices. And I will choose between them depending upon what you suggest.</span></div>
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<li>I make a note of weekly progress and share my victories and challenges with you each week</li>
<li>I make a note of weekly progress and share it with you at the end of three weeks.</li>
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<span class="s1">What would you prefer? Wish me luck.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-34751669416079069402015-12-07T10:29:00.000+05:302015-12-07T10:31:51.590+05:305 Lessons I Learned About Life From a Workshop on Autism<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">Before becoming an independent content marketing consultant, I spent almost nine years in the corporate, trying to make my way through it, eventually (and happily) giving up. I couldn’t digest many aspects of the corporate world - especially its culture. I kept feeling like everyone chased the same things, blissfully unaware that they were headed in a wrong, overcrowded direction.</span></div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-aKgiCzy7w-Q/VmUNY5t-TUI/AAAAAAAAC3c/h3qAdP_fTPE/s1600/The%2BRight%2BWay.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="306" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-aKgiCzy7w-Q/VmUNY5t-TUI/AAAAAAAAC3c/h3qAdP_fTPE/s400/The%2BRight%2BWay.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1">Last weekend, I attended a seminar on autism, thanks to my friends at <a href="http://saiconnections.com/" target="_blank">SAI Connections</a>. The speakers included Dr. Steven Gutstein (Dr. G), the founder of an autism treatment program named <a href="http://rdiconnect.com/" target="_blank">Relationship Development Intervention</a> (RDI), and Mrs. Kamini Lakhani, someone who, in the last year, has shown me the other side of <a href="http://www.webmd.com/brain/autism/default.htm" target="_blank">autism spectrum disorder</a> - a side that 97 percent of us don’t know about. The more I interact with her, the more intrigued I am about the condition. Because while I earlier looked at autism as a disability, Kamini showed me how remarkable children with the condition are. True, their brains are wired differently from us, but that doesn’t make them disabled. In fact, the more I read about <a href="http://saiconnections.com/category/blog/success-stories/" target="_blank">these amazing children</a>, the more I feel like we ‘normal’ people are the ones who are disabled.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">As I heard Dr. G’s speak, I started correlating his concepts about autism to everyday life. Everything he said had lessons for leaders.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">When you hear the word ‘leader’, do you only think of a politician or senior executive of a giant multinational corporation? No, leadership encompasses much more. You can be a leader if you are a parent, a musician, a spouse, a team member or anyone whom others look up to.<br />
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<span class="s1">Here are 5 lessons applicable to leaders which I learned at the workshop:</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">1. Plug the hole</span></b></h3>
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Dr. G gave a terrific example - one which struck an instant chord with us: A ship is sinking, and the captain and crew are busy siphoning out the water. I have a glue that will fix the problem for good, but the team will have to stop bailing out the water and work with me. “We’re busy right now,” they say. “If we stop bailing the water out, the ship will sink.” Fair enough. But we are humans. Ultimately, our muscles will give way, and we will fail to siphon the water at the same speed as it’s entry. Or we will just die out of exhaustion. And the ship will sink anyway.</div>
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We are <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/01/3-things-einstein-taught-me-about.html" target="_blank">enamored with ‘fire-fighting’</a>. We wear it like a badge, always addressing seemingly urgent things without addressing what is actually important. We are busy making others do what we want, or doing things ourselves because ‘we are faster at them’. But in the long run, we make people dependent on us. And once that happens, we complain about having to do everything, burning out, not having a life anymore and so on. </div>
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Remember: Short term pains for long term gains. If you truly want to stoke someone’s creativity and independence, focus on plugging the hole of the ship rather than bailing out the water.</div>
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rKomrjoQHSM/VmUOMWduImI/AAAAAAAAC3k/-eP5jzc-J0w/s1600/Kamini%2BLakhani%2B20151207_101103_1449463298716.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="372" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-rKomrjoQHSM/VmUOMWduImI/AAAAAAAAC3k/-eP5jzc-J0w/s400/Kamini%2BLakhani%2B20151207_101103_1449463298716.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">(L-R: Dr. Steven Gutstein, Mrs. Kamini Lakhani and Dr. Rachelle Sheely)</td></tr>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">2. The far end of the pool</span></b></h3>
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Parents and professionals overwhelm <a href="http://saiconnections.com/causes-autism-children/" target="_blank">children with autism</a> with infinite information, believing that the children will eventually grasp it. But it doesn’t work. They throw the child in the pool (metaphorically) hoping that he will learn to swim. Often however, the child steps out of the pool to save his life, and never returns. This hurts not only the parents but also the child, because his development is impeded.</div>
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The same happens in the professional world. Managers simply ‘throw people in the pool’ and expect them to perform. But this ’First day-First hour productivity’ is an overhyped misconception. When a pilot is trained, she is not immediately put onto the simulator, and bombarded with poor weather conditions and an engine malfunction. She is guided over time to develop the necessary skills to handle any situation - even the ones not included in the simulator.</div>
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The same principles must be applied by us. Before you expect a miracle from your subordinate, child, or team member, you must help her imbibe the necessary skills to deliver one. Remember, if the child or subordinate cannot do what you expected, the blame lies squarely on your shoulders… on the shoulders of the leader.</div>
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<b>3. Empower growth seeking</b></h3>
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Like children, if subordinates have to grow, they have to be presented with a positive and predictable environment. Before you try to develop specific skills in people, you must provide them with experiences which make them feel secure.</div>
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Motivation should be growth-seeking, not growth-limiting. I have seen far too many bosses do the latter. They demotivate people, or instill fear in them. This not only reflects the insecurity of the inept managers, but also builds a culture where people want to quit, not grow.</div>
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Leaders, on the other hand, alter the way their subordinates perceive themselves. They let their team members expand themselves to grow mindfully and accept unpredictability. Dr. G emphasizes on helping children with autism develop a sense of self, without which, they cannot function in a world which is not black and white. I believe the same can be applied to each avenue where a leader functions.</div>
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<b>4. Most things don’t matter</b></h3>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_NNAngjJwtg/VmUR25WgyCI/AAAAAAAAC3w/d4wgKECXbxI/s1600/Tim%2BFerriss.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-_NNAngjJwtg/VmUR25WgyCI/AAAAAAAAC3w/d4wgKECXbxI/s640/Tim%2BFerriss.png" width="640" /></a></div>
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We are always busy. Phone notifications, emails, meetings, multitasking, parenting, working… there is so much to do, and such little time! Surely, we should get better at time management.</div>
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But time management is a myth. <b><a href="http://lifehacker.com/5961603/im-tim-ferriss-and-this-is-how-i-work" target="_blank">Task management</a></b> is the truth. It’s not about the number of tasks that you do, it’s about the number of times you do specific tasks which matter to you.</div>
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<a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/ive-followed-warren-buffett-decades-10-quotes-what-i-keep-green?trk=hp-feed-article-title" target="_blank">Warren Buffet has a philosophy</a>: Write down 25 goals, and choose the 5 most important ones. Don’t put the others on the back burner. Instead, ignore them. Every time you have a task in mind, ask yourself, “Does this fit in with my goal?” If the answer is yes, proceed. If not, ignore it.</div>
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You will find that you can pursue selective work that pays off and will have more time for yourself. Sounds like a paradox, doesn’t it?</div>
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<b>5. Don’t tell, show</b></h3>
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As I mentioned, before I met Kamini, I thought autism was a disability, that affected children were incapable of living independent lives, and that they are liabilities for their parents.</div>
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But in the last year, Kamini has shown me how wrong I was. And Dr. G did the same in his workshop. They spent more time demonstrating through videos and activities than telling me. And rather than telling me to get rid of my misconceptions, they watched patiently as I put all my delusions in a box, threw them off a cliff, and waited for the sound of them smashing against the rocks.</div>
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Barking orders and instructions is not half as effective as showing people. Language can never replace visuals. Use results, case studies, videos or anything that can keep people captivated.</div>
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It’s funny how life is, isn’t it? We find inspiration at the most unexpected places. I am single. Yet I took away a lot from a workshop about autism, and will implement them in my life. Which point struck a chord with you the most?<span class="s1"></span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-41081272237431955932015-11-26T15:39:00.000+05:302015-11-27T12:05:14.167+05:30When You Should Apologize... Or You Shouldn't<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">“Vishal, you didn’t apologize to me.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“For what?”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“For having spoken rudely to me two days ago.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“When?”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“When you got angry and insulted me when I said that you shouldn’t ride bikes because they’re not safe.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Well, I love riding. And you persisted despite me explaining how integral a part of my life it is.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“That doesn’t allow you to be rude.” Her voice grew louder.t</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“I wasn’t rude. I just told you that I wouldn’t stop riding and that you should back off.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“So you won’t apologize?”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Nope.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“THEN YOU DON’T DESERVE ME!” she cried. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Fine.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">This occurred in a mall. She violently pushed away her chair and walked away in a huff. I finished my burger, got up and walked quietly, mentally fist-bumping every man who gave me a look of admiration (feminists, please keep your judgement to yourselves).</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Unfortunately she did not break up with me. But she refused to speak to me for three (peaceful) days. It’s the small moments of joy and happiness that we should appreciate.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Standing up for what you believe in was always considered a taboo. Mankind has evolved in leaps and bounds in technology or quality of life. But our limbic brain - our lizard brain - stays as apish as it was about 15 million years ago. If someone is offended by what we did or said, the status quo demands that we apologize. Why? Because the person was hurt. It doesn’t matter that the our sentiments were hurt before by him. This logic is messed up. But then, society is messed up anyway.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Apologies exact a toll on the offender, as <a href="http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/advantages-of-not-saying-you-are-sorry/"><span class="s2">this article states</span></a>. When you apologize to someone, you hand the power over to them - the power to extend forgiveness and appear like ‘the bigger person’, or to deny the apology and make you feel like crap.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">This does not mean that we should not apologize when we do something wrong (Aamir Khan, are you listening?). But apologies should not be trivial, or rendered often or lightly. Especially not when you meant what you said. Because when you apologize for something you meant, you silently tell the ‘victim’, </span><br />
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<span class="s1" style="font-size: large;">“Your approval of me is more important than my personal feelings.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">And that sucks.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">You know this, right? Haven’t you found yourself in a situation where you thought, “I shouldn’t have to apologize.” Yet, may of us do it. Why? Because of social pressure, which induces a feeling of guilt. And trust me, as much as that feeling is real, it is irrelevant.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Here is what you should do to get rid of the feeling of guilt:</span></div>
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<b>Be comfortable in your skin</b></div>
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The main reason for this feeling of guilt stems from being unsure about ourselves. Fear and anxiety often dominate our thoughts during such periods. But we have to free ourselves from these insecurities, and take back the power of being secure in who we are - with our flaws and strengths. Read <a href="http://www.marcandangel.com/2015/11/18/10-things-to-remember-when-you-feel-unsure-of-yourself/"><span class="s2">this article</span></a> to know how to overcome self doubt and get comfortable with yourself (h/t to <a href="http://saiconnections.com/category/blog/from-kaminis-heart/"><span class="s2">Kamini</span></a> for sharing it).</div>
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<b>Choose your battles</b></div>
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<b>“Life is too short to spend it on warring. Fight only the most important ones and let go of the rest.” - </b><span class="s2"><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4114218.C_JoyBell_C_"><b>C. Joybell C.</b></a></span></div>
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Not all battles are worth fighting. in fact, most are not. And guess what. Fighting too many battles leaves your tank empty when you need the energy to stand up for yourself the most. <a href="http://personalexcellence.co/blog/choose-your-battles/"><span class="s2">Choose a battle</span></a> which has serious, long-term implications. Let go if the consequences are little.</div>
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You will encounter trolls and dismissive people. But remember: their picking on you does not reflect on your inadequacies, but on their own. Carry on with your work. But when they make a habit of it, you must throw back one punch. One punch which makes the world stand up and say to them - “Oh! You got ‘owned’!” And then, don't apologize for throwing the it.</div>
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<b>Don’t be a d**k</b></div>
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Shane Watson was batting with a cramp. Shikhar Dhawan was taunting him on the field, acting like he had a limp. Dhoni intervened. He was having none of this. He openly indicated to Dhawan, “Don’t be a d**k.”</div>
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How many times have the Aussies sledged their opponents? Those instances are more than the number of stars in the sky. But does Dhoni use a thorn to draw a thorn? In fact, during his press conferences, Dhoni comes out with responses which put the media and opponents in their places without being apologetic. And it makes us go, “Oh! He ‘owned’ them!”</div>
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Mount personal attacks on someone who pisses you off and you become easy pickings for your instigator. He can show the world that you called him a/n [insert expletive here] and gain sympathy. All this while he was the person who started it.</div>
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Stay calm and go about your work. But when you must, respond to the situation, not the person. This emotional balance will help you keep critics at bay, maintain inner peace and command respect from those around you.</div>
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<b>What matters more?</b></div>
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Does the person matter more, or what he said? If it’s the former, is he having a bad day? Is it a one-off instance or frequent?</div>
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If it is one-off, can you find the reason behind it, or ignore it? And if it is frequent, do you want to stay connected with someone who behaves like a jerk all the time? I don’t need to elaborate, do I? You are smart enough to get the drift.</div>
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<span class="s1">If you stand up for yourself, there will be consequences. People will call you arrogant, selfish, a jerk, rude, and many other adjectives. They will hate you. But this isn’t hatred. In reality, it’s jealousy - of your guts to speak your mind and stand up for what you believe in. After all, people often hate those whom they want to be like.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Nobody owes you anything, and you owe nothing to anyone. If someone tells you what to do and you don’t want to, follow Robert Downey Jr.’s advice.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Stop apologizing for what you think is right. Live your life with no regrets, like your mom will be proud to read about it if it appears on the right hand side of the front page of a newspaper. For all you know, some day it will.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-57284082735380616702015-11-16T09:26:00.000+05:302015-11-16T21:26:32.918+05:3011 lessons I learned from Jeff Bullas in 3 Days<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="text-align: left;">You have seen his caricature everywhere, and almost certainly have read his blog posts. If not, the online influencers you follow have definitely mentioned his name. You cannot deny that.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><a href="http://jeffbullas.com/" target="_blank">Jeff Bullas</a> was in Mumbai for the <a href="https://www.bnlf.com/" target="_blank">2-day BNLF</a> event organized by <a href="http://www.indiblogger.in/" target="_blank">Indiblogger</a>. His keynote on day 1 was awesome, and his masterclass on day 2 was… well, a masterclass.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Where Vinita (of the <a href="http://blogwatig.com/" target="_blank">BlogwatiG</a> fame) and I REALLY got lucky was on the third day, when we got the online marketing guru exclusively to ourselves. Jeff, Vinita and I spent the day roaming around Mumbai. We discussed many topics - culture, sports, experiences, politics, blogging, psychology and more. That Vinita and I learned a lot from Jeff is an understatement. I’ve put together a list of 11 splendid lessons Jeff gave us in 3 days... lessons which you would happily pay money for. But I'm sharing them with you for free!</span><br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Clockwise - Vinita, Jeff and me</td></tr>
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<span class="s1"><b><i>Disclaimer:</i></b> This is a really looooong post. And yet, it covers only about 7 percent of what we learned. However, this 7 percent can turn your life on its head.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The best lesson is the last one. So I hope you stay till the end.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">1. Our biggest challenge</span></b><br />
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<span class="s1">“The difficulty lies not so much in developing new ideas as in escaping from old ones.” - John Maynard Keynes.</span></blockquote>
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<span class="s1">If you have to walk away right now because your spouse is calling, or your child is crying, make sure you take this one lesson with you.</span><br />
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<span class="s1">The adage of “thinking outside the box” has been beaten to death. Yet, almost everyone finds it impossible (not difficult… impossible) to do, because we are rigidly anchored to old ideas. “It’s always been like this” is our fallback theory.<br /><br /><b><u>
Takeaway</u>:</b> Before you think outside the box (or even try), unlearn old practices, and learn new ones. Out with the old and in with the new. Because the day you are through with change, you are through.</span><br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">2. Re-invent yourself</span></b></span></div>
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“I have re-invented myself many times over the years”, says Jeff. The last time he he did was in 2008, when he adopted social media and started his journey towards becoming the guru that he is today. And he continues doing so.<br />
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The world is changing at the rate of knots. What was indispensable a few years ago is now redundant. We’re perilously close to Digital Darwinism, where technology advances so fast that mankind is unable to keep up. Yet, most of us stay trapped in our comfort zones because… well, “it’s always been like this”. Remember point #1?<br />
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People who have flourished are the ones who have re-invented themselves, time and again. You must re-invent yourself too - repeatedly. Unless, of course, you don’t mind becoming as obsolete as the walkman. (By the way, the walkman can still demand a premium today. Can you?)<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> If you still are counting the laurels of yesterday, you are not doing enough today. What you achieved in the past may have worked, but that is the past. It’s time to do something new. As Gary Vee says, “do what is relevant in 2015, not in 2007.”<br />
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Which bring us to the obvious question: “How do I re-invent myself?” Well, read on.<br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">3. What are you good at?</span></b></span></div>
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Jeff firmly believes in <a href="http://betterexplained.com/articles/understanding-the-pareto-principle-the-8020-rule/" target="_blank">Pareto’s Law</a> - that 80% of your results stem from 20% of your work. And he follows it to the ’T’. He focuses on the 20 percent activities which yield him maximum returns. The remaining 80 percent he either delegates, outsources or ignores. This not only lets him focus on what he is good at, but also helps him excel in those areas. And you know that in today’s world, ‘good’ and ‘unique’ don’t cut it anymore. You have to be remarkable.<br />
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To find what you are good at, Jeff suggests that you read ‘<a href="http://www.amazon.in/Now-Discover-your-Strengths-Develop/dp/1416502653/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1447640268&sr=1-1&keywords=now+discover+your+strengths+by+marcus+buckingham" target="_blank">Now Discover Your Strengths</a>’ by Marcus Buckingham. Along with insights on discovering your forte, this book gives you an online test which sheds light on your five key strengths. Based on those strengths, you can take up what you are good at and start a journey towards reinventing yourself.<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> 80 percent of your results stem from 20 percent of your work. Draw a list of your activities to map out which ones give you maximum returns, and which ones waste your time. Pareto’s Law will make you better at what you love, and drill the much needed focus into your life. And yes, read ‘Now Discover Your Strengths’.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">4. Think bigger</span></b></span></div>
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“The population of Sydney is about 4 million, and that of Australia is about 25 million, which is less than the population of Mumbai”, said Jeff. He possesses in-depth knowledge of each city and country he visits. But I’m digressing here.<br />
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If Jeff intended on catering solely to the Aussie audience, he would have run out of new customers quickly. So his focus is not just Australia. It’s the US, Canada, India and the whole world. A sizable chunk of his readers are from India. Who would’ve thought! Jeff has also delivered keynotes at Kuwait and Beirut too. “Stop thinking local. Think bigger, think global” is his mantra.<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> The internet is a fantastic platform for you to reach out to every relevant person in the world. So stop catering purely to the audience in your city or country. You have no idea how your work can positively impact someone in a different continent. Think bigger. The world is your oyster.<br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">5. Your purpose in life</span></b><br />
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Find out what you really want to do in life, and pursue it. Once you do, you will forget phrases like ‘Monday morning blues’ and ‘TGIF’. You will look forward to waking up each morning, and won't have to work another day in your life. You will not only be productive, you will be happy.<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> “Many people go to their grave without singing their song.” - Jeff Bullas (h/t to <a href="http://blogwatig.com/" target="_blank">Vinita</a> for the reminder). Which song will you sing? Someone else’s, or your own?<br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">6. How we unknowingly waste resources</span></b></span></div>
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“I spend a lot of my time working with competition than working against it”, Jeff said to us over tea at the BNLF event. This is popularly known as <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coopetition" target="_blank">coopetition</a>. Here is a quote from an ebook by <a href="http://www.copyblogger.com/" target="_blank">Copyblogger</a> to validate it:<br />
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There aren’t many ‘lone wolves’ out there anymore. Partnerships and cross pollination are the name of the game. If you’re building your business on an audience attracted by your authority on a particular topic, you want to spend most of your time working with, not against, the ‘competitors’ for that audience.</span></blockquote>
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Unfortunately, the vast majority spends time competing against each other. This leads to drain in resources like time, effort and funds. And how much do you have to show at the end of these wars?<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> Collaborate with your competition to offer value to your audience, and reap the rewards faster. You will double your business while investing less than half the resources.<br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">7. Have an audience before you need it</span></b></span></div>
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Understandably, full time bloggers want to make money off of blogging. When Jeff was asked how bloggers can get deals to write sponsored posts, there was pin-drop silence in the hall. The whole audience listened with rapt attention - like Batman was speaking to us. Batman… sorry… Jeff, had one thing to say:</span></div>
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<b>"Have an audience before you need it."</b></div>
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Banner ads and Adsense will not help you make money unless you get massive traffic to your blog. Instead, work on building an audience which you will own rather than rent. Build an email subscription base, encourage readers to share your content and return to your site, and strive for simplicity and value addition to offer terrific user experience.<br />
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It’s also important to put yourself out there. Brands rarely approach bloggers asking them to write sponsored posts, unless the bloggers are extremely popular. Until you reach that level of popularity, keep approaching brands and pitching your ideas of sponsored posts.<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> Have an audience before you need it. Grow this audience by offering remarkable value and making them share something personal with you in return. Read <a href="http://www.growthhackers.com/" target="_blank">GrowthHackers</a> and <a href="http://inbound.org/"><span class="s2">inbound.org</span></a> to learn how you can grow your audience.<br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">8. The only way to discover your potential</span></b></span></div>
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As a child, Jeff suffered from asthma. Today he runs marathons and is an avid bicyclist. He cycles almost everywhere he goes. He pushed the limits of his body and came out on top. Jeff - 1, asthma - 0.<br />
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Likewise, to discover your potential, you must keep pushing yourself to progress to the next level. Read this amazing <a href="http://zenpencils.com/comic/36-bruce-lee-there-are-no-limits/" target="_blank">Zen Pencils comic strip</a> on how Bruce Lee pushed his limits.<br />
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Jeff pushes his followers too. Many in his coopetition circle might not agree with his frequency of tweets, but it works for him. “If your audience is not complaining, you are not pushing hard enough”, he says. Amazing!<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> “If you don’t hear complains, you are not pushing hard enough.” This is applicable to your body, your mind, and your followers. Even remarkable has an expiry date in today’s day and age. Don’t stop progressing.<br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">9. Optimize for conversion</span></b></span></div>
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Many businesses start blogging merely for brand awareness. While awareness is important, what matters more is knowing what you want from your audience.<br />
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Don’t use campaigns purely to create ‘brand awareness’. Optimize for conversion right from the word go. Conversions don’t have to be sales. They can be newsletter subscriptions, signing up for trial offers or becoming a lead.<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> If you create guides, DIYs or blog posts for awareness and educating your audience, ask for something in return. Optimizing for conversion makes people return to your property, and helps you build an audience before you need it (see point #7).<br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">10. What to do when your product is expensive</span></b></span></div>
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I faced a problem with a specific landing page on which we were selling tickets for an event. The target audience loved the content and gave feedback like “we have never seen anything like this in India.” Yet, nobody bought tickets. I asked Jeff.<br />
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“The more your product costs, the more the number of steps to get customers onboard should be”, he said. Jeff has an intricate system of converting users. Using <a href="http://www.infusionsoft.com/" target="_blank">Infusionsoft</a>, he segments his audience. People who show interest in his products by clicking through on the <a href="http://www.copyblogger.com/call-to-action-buttons/" target="_blank">Calls-to-Action</a> are provided with more value-added content before he pitches for a sale. Even in this category, he has sub-categories, and customizes his messages for various groups.</span><br />
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<span class="s1">The vast amount of information he shared had my head spinning, and I had to focus hard to avoid ramming into the car in front.<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> The higher the price of your offering, the more circumspect your audience will be. Increase the number of steps to convert your audience to customers.<br />
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<span class="s1"><b><span style="font-size: large;">11. Done is better than perfect</span></b></span></div>
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We’re down to the last, and most critical lesson (thanks for staying till the end). Many of us (including yours truly) have images of how we want things, and refuse to move forward unless something is exactly like that.<br /><br />
During his keynote, Jeff spoke about someone who was not ready to take her blog live because she wanted everything to be perfect. Here is news flash: Perfection can never be achieved! We will always want something more, and then more, and more. The project never goes live and eventually, it’s shelved. When Jeff said this, I felt like he was looking right through the thousand bloggers present and speaking directly to me.<br />
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Perfection is a utopian state, something we are always in pursuit of. Even global influencers like Jeff are constantly working on improvement. So start now, and pursue excellence. Success will follow suit. You have a whole lifetime to pursue perfection.<br />
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Takeaway</u>:</b> Done is better than Perfect. Stop waiting for the perfect moment and start now. Period. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">It was one of the best days of Vinita’s and my life. We showed Jeff CST, Marine Drive, and Colaba. We visited Café Mondegar and the Gateway of India. At the end of a lovely day, I shook hands with Jeff and Vinita hugged him. He then looked at me and asked, “Won’t you give me a hug?”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“I thought a hug would make you uncomfortable”, I said.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Naah, mate. I’m good with a hug”. And we hugged.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Jeff, we’re really glad you came to India and spoke to us all. And dear reader, I’m glad you stayed till the end. If you take something away from this post, you can thank Jeff and me. And if you are upset about not being invited to the day out, it’s Vinita’s fault. She told me not to invite you.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com40tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-60168758361189449042015-11-10T08:02:00.000+05:302015-11-10T08:02:07.481+05:30Nothing Can Match Drives and Memories<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“I’m bored”, I said. “Why must all Mondays be like this?”</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“You’re especially feeling like this because of your vacation”, Vikrant said. I had just returned that morning from a 5-day trip to Goa. I was missing the beaches, the food, the lovely weather and… well, everything that we do in Goa. Add to that the Monday morning blues and the feeling of staring at a computer screen, attending meetings, and wading through office politics for six whole days and the moodiness was compounded.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Vikrant sensed it, and offered to drive down to Datta Snacks in Panvel where we could drink </span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">kokum sherbat</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">. We had time to reach office, but not so much that we could drive from Kopar Khairane to Panvel and back.</span></div>
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<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Dude, you’ve already been away from office for 5 days, right?”, he asked.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Yes.”</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“So how will one more day hurt? Plus, this will prepare me for the week ahead too.” Fair point.</span></div>
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<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So he stepped on the gas of his recently-restored Suzuki Gypsy. The feeling of speeding past office on a Monday morning brought a smile my face. Vikrant assured me that we would return in a little more than an hour. This was also an opportunity for him to really test the Gypsy’s abilities - he hadn’t opened the throttle in a while.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The road to Panvel passes from under the Mumbai-Pune Expressway. As we approached Kalamboli, I thought aloud that the Expressway would have been a great place to test the Gypsy. And as we approached the diversion, I waited for him to turn. Instead, he went straight and got onto the Expressway.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“Vikrant, what are you doing? We will miss work!”</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">“</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: italic; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Tune apna mooh kyun khola? Ab chup chaap chal</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> (Why did you open your mouth. Now come along without resistance).”</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Datta Snacks? Be damned.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Even worse, office? Back to fair point.</span></div>
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<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">So we drove along. Vikrant rarely shows emotions - stoics would be proud. But today, I could see his teeth. The engine had done its 1,000 kilometres run-in so he opened the throttle. The Gypsy motored along at 110 km/h on the Expressway, but the fumes which get into the cabin were giving me a heady feeling. Anyway, the breeze compensated and I survived till we turned for Lonavla. We stopped at a hotel to have breakfast and fresh lime soda. And I started feeling better. Maybe it was the soda, maybe it was the feeling of sitting in an empty restaurant on a Monday morning while people were rushing to work… but Vikrant knew that the best way to rejuvenate me was to put me at the wheel. Again, if you know me, you also know that I am not formal with friends. And I love the ghats of Lonavla. So the “oh, are you sure? She’s your baby” dialogue never took place. I sat on the driver’s seat and prepared for a lovely drive up to Aamby Valley. I was keen on testing how the front sway bar and the CEAT Plus One R16 tyres would aid the SUV’s performance on the twisties.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">For a vehicle which had been introduced around similar times to the Yamaha RD350, the vehicle’s stance was impressive. I had to put in some effort in turns because she didn't have power steering (Vikrant is a boisterous Jharkhandi who didn’t want power steering). But every turn I took, the 16” CEATs ensured that the Gypsy stuck to the line that I took. The heady feeling was quickly replaced by one of relaxation. Here’s a little secret: just before Aamby Valley is a diversion which is off-road terrain and leads to a village. When I offered to take the Gypsy there, Vikrant’s eyes lit up and he snatched the steering back (not literally, of course). And the SUV went through the ‘course’ with remarkable aplomb. On rocky terrains where one would gingerly have to drive a sedan at the speeds of 10-20, the Gypsy seemed comfortable at 60 kmph. This time, I heard Vikrant laugh.</span><br />
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tNdw6tGCOFE/VkFWws1nQGI/AAAAAAAAC0s/lvxeDbWGyKU/s1600/Gypsy1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="364" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tNdw6tGCOFE/VkFWws1nQGI/AAAAAAAAC0s/lvxeDbWGyKU/s640/Gypsy1.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<b style="font-weight: normal;"><span id="goog_2057082800"></span><span id="goog_2057082801"></span><br /></b>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">By the time we were back home, it was 4 already.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: "arial"; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There was hell to pay for the next day. Not only because both of us called in sick just an hour before office started, but because our other friends shared a piece of their mind about our adventure without them. Especially because Vikrant didn’t hand over the keys of the Gypsy to anyone until the previous day. To compensate, he let everyone drive the SUV around the campus during the lunch break (our office had a 140-acre campus). And as they say, all’s well that ends well.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-48536565535807413092015-11-04T15:34:00.002+05:302015-11-04T22:37:10.229+05:30What Happens When You Sell Out to the Wrong People<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">Valentino Rossi and Marc Marquez were slugging it out at the Malaysian MotoGP. The way they were going at each other, something had to give. And it did!</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Rossi pushed Marquez off his bike.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I was furious! “FUCK YOU ROSSI!” I screamed, running towards the TV. “WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU ARE!”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">My mother came running from the kitchen. “What happened, Vishal?”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">"GO BACK TO YOUR WORK, WOMAN!” I shouted, and continued hurling abuses at Rossi.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Okay, that didn’t happen. Here is the real version.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Rossi pushed Marquez off his bike. I sat up in my chair and said “Ooh!”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Mom handed me a plate, saying “ ‘Ooh’ <i>ke bacche, yeh le khaana kha</i> (Stop shouting and eat your food).” And I ate, quietly wondering whether Rossi would be penalized for that horrifying act or would get away scot-free yet again. You see, Rossi is to Dorna Sports (which governs MotoGP) what Robert Vadra is to the Indian National Congress.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Be honest. The first version sounded great, didn’t it? Like I really put myself out there, like it was heartfelt, like passion was running through my veins. You enjoyed reading it. But it wasn’t true. It was grossly exaggerated.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I had a conversation yesterday with a friend about <a href="http://www.jamesaltucher.com/" target="_blank">James Altucher</a>. Many of his articles have lines like:</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“I’m sorry I lied to you that day I posted on……………..”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“…………and [I] didn’t answer until eventually she left, screaming my name.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Fuck you dad. RIP!”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">She believes he writes from the heart (no offense dear friend, I know you’re reading this). And I said that he is the Chetan Bhagat of the United States. She scoffed.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Right on cue, James held an Ask Me Anything (AMA) on <a href="http://www.growthhackers.com/" target="_blank">GrowthHackers</a> last night. For the uninitiated, Growth Hackers is a fabulous portal where people share articles on content, growing a business and online marketing and more. And this was the description.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><br /></span></div>
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<a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-e0VPV_eTY78/VjnVIbta5oI/AAAAAAAACz4/aoiUC_Zf6dA/s1600/James_Altucher.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="342" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-e0VPV_eTY78/VjnVIbta5oI/AAAAAAAACz4/aoiUC_Zf6dA/s640/James_Altucher.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1">What did he think he would achieve by mentioning that he went into a ‘depression’ on GrowthHackers, a site dedicated to content marketing? Wait. Maybe this is content marketing. What if James knows that the most effective way for him to market his content (read 'books') is to berate himself? That enables millions to connect with his content, and buy his books.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Kanan Gill summed up the human attraction to grief and misery perfectly (I’m paraphrasing here)</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Suppose we maintain a diary. If we look at a day in 2014, we read about having stepped into a pile of dog shit. That’s all we focused on, that day. The good that occurred found no mention and was taken for granted.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">We like ruing over pain. And we gravitate towards people who share theirs with us. It makes them appear genuine, vulnerable. But is that what we need?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">On one side, we have James Altucher who writes about how ‘<b>fucked</b>’ his life has been, in every post. And when I turn my head (or rather turn on the tele), I find yet another news channel slandering a man - something that they have indulged in for almost 15 years.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">This man sold tea with his father when he was a child. His mother was a maid at others’ houses so that the family could make ends meet. He joined a political outfit and rose through the ranks to become the Chief Minister of his state. In 2002, a communal riot broke out. The world blamed him for it. The United States <a href="http://www.wsj.com/articles/SB10001424052702303380004579520041301275638"><span class="s2">denied him a visa</span></a>. The Supreme Court cleared his name, and he was elected the Prime Minister of India. But to this day, people call him a 'murderer', among millions of other derogatory terms. And he continues toiling to improve the condition of India, to empower the poor and make our country a global superpower. Yes, he is Narendra Modi.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-xD58oLlEFPU/VjnZaXfWhII/AAAAAAAAC0Q/ZwQRC7yNvP8/s1600/Book%2BHeart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="360" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-xD58oLlEFPU/VjnZaXfWhII/AAAAAAAAC0Q/ZwQRC7yNvP8/s640/Book%2BHeart.jpg" width="640" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image <a href="https://www.flickr.com/photos/kumarsedit/15713808697/in/photolist-pWznSa-8TPvAz-7yYrUj-5NpZho-92P6zA-5vPPad-jU7zAx-7hZ6Ec-9gXQs5-9h2LCa-vLkeec-dEX7qS-6FNDJe-b6zyox-aXLNWt-fycLgY-aNe5H6-pVVsnq-8G9HjT-6CGpEf-aLqauz-8d17Re-ckWa37-btQDbV-8kKhNA-qGpCKH-9nFjab-ms1GZV-dvmEb7-pDKEVG-qBvLF4-89PmUG-y8Pf24-7CRWpU-4qkmmx-5JzFqA-6At7jb-h7p1Ax-aXiiZF-5DkoVv-bp2NSJ-jm4vcc-5VvyH5-qXs4iA-9cHtja-67pDLv-7RUjSi-niJX9T-7CZSzf-dHPLiV" target="_blank">Source</a></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span class="s1">Or consider MS Dhoni. The man has captained India to win every competition. But a couple of bad series and we (media and mango men) bay for his blood, prepare the scaffold and wait for the opportunity to take him to it in chains and celebrate with pomp along the way.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/04/dhoni-modi-similarities.html" target="_blank">Dhoni and Modi</a> are torchbearers of hope for millions across India and the world. And yet we treat them like dirt. If there are people who deserve to cry about how ‘<b>fucked</b>’ their lives are, these two deserve it the most. Yet, their steely determination shows in their eyes as they carry on their work, achieving in a single life what we will not achieve in seven. We, on the other hand, prefer reading stories of people who................. well...............</span></div>
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<span class="s1">It’s fine to display emotions. The occasional display shows a side of you that people didn’t know, making you appear more human. But too much self deprecation or broadcasting of misery makes me feel uncomfortable, and it should make you feel the same. Life is about moving forward after all, yes?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">James Altucher is fun to read. Please don't misunderstand this post as one saying that you must stop reading his stuff. But for inspiration, look at people who keep moving in spite of the odds rather than selling themselves based on them. It’s time you let people find place inside your heart based on what we want to do. Do you want to whine? Or do you want your life to be worth watching when it flashes by on your deathbed?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">For each choice, you have options. Choose wisely.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-80021469875558653872015-10-06T12:19:00.002+05:302015-10-06T19:10:17.827+05:305 Awesome Qualities of MS Dhoni<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<i>Someone posted a question on Quora asking about some good qualities of MS Dhoni. Some amazing answers were posted, offering insights into the genius' brain and temperament. I shared my 50 paise too.</i></div>
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<i>Before reading my answer, please remember that everything I write is as an interested observer, and certainly not based on fundamental research. I'm as much in the dark as others about MS Dhoni, but love exercising my brain on what drives him, and learning from him.</i></div>
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<i>Below is <a href="https://www.quora.com/What-are-some-good-qualities-of-MS-Dhoni/answer/Vishal-Kataria" target="_blank">my answer</a> to the question: What are some good qualities of MS Dhoni?</i></div>
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We look at MS Dhoni as a remarkable leader and batsman. But we must remember that his success stems from his perspective on life, which, as he says, the game is just a part of. In this answer, I’ll go a little deeper than his skills on the field, but will use examples of his cricketing life to justify my points.</div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KIbpqcDb6yU/VhNpgwquzxI/AAAAAAAACzM/uRIxfVSzBtU/s1600/MS%2BDhoni%2BLeadership.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-KIbpqcDb6yU/VhNpgwquzxI/AAAAAAAACzM/uRIxfVSzBtU/s1600/MS%2BDhoni%2BLeadership.jpg" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Yeah buddy... keep smiling :)</td></tr>
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<li class="li3"><b>Detachment<br />
</b>I remember watching highlights of the 2011 World Cup India-Pakistan semifinal with a friend. The match ended (we won), and Sachin jovially hugged Mahi. The latter merely smiled and hugged him with one arm since he was carrying a stump in the other. “Dekh kitna attitude hai usme (look how haughty he is)!”, my friend said about MSD. But it wasn’t attitude that Dhoni showed. It was detachment - from results, from emotions, the past and the future.<br />
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There is simply an eternal state of calm inside him, looking at things as the plain truth rather than adding personal judgement to them. Detachment is also what enabled him to announce his test retirement after the 90th test match in the way he did, rather than doing so after 100 tests and announcing it before a test so that he would get a standing ovation, a guard of honor etc.<br /><br />
</li>
<li class="li3"><b>Seeing the good in people<br />
</b>We know the story, right? Dhoni joined the Indian cricket team and was often picked on by Yuvraj Singh because he was from a lesser known town. Yuvraj picked on Dhoni when the latter scored 148 in ODIs, saying that the true mark of a player lay in how he played test matches and so on. One day, Dhoni simply asked him why he was always so angry. Yuvraj smiled and that broke the ice between them. Yuvraj went on to play many a match-winning roles for India under Dhoni, especially in the 2007 T20 World Cup and 2011 ICC World Cup. How would we respond to someone who is, say, a senior in our office space and keeps picking on us? Dhoni could probably see the good in Yuvraj, and hence coolly bypassed his bullying behavior and connected with him like few others could.<br /><br />
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<li class="li3"><b>Having faith in people<br />
</b>Dhoni’s ability to back the right players doesn’t stem from a lesson of some business management course. His ability to see the good in people helps him give them assurance, which brings often out the best in them. Remember when Gautam Gambhir had lauded Dhoni when the former found a permanent spot in the Indian team? “Dhoni gave me the assurance that I would not have to worry about a spot in the team”, he said. “That gave me the freedom to play the way I liked.” And we know how many flourishing innings Gambhir has played for India. The more people are assured, the better they perform, as ex-Apple designer <a href="http://www.fastcodesign.com/3030923/4-myths-about-apple-design-from-an-ex-apple-designer" target="_blank">Mark Kawano highlights</a>.<br />
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We question why Dhoni backed Jadeja for so long. But Dhoni can look beyond Jadeja’s batting ability, sees him as one of India’s best fielders and a useful spinner. There are more roles a player can don than one. And his faith in people pays off more often than not, because people want to prove themselves when someone places faith in them.<br /><br />
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<li class="li3"><b>Seeing himself as part of a Whole<br />
</b>In every answer, people who have met MSD talk about his humility. It’s also visible from the way he speaks and where he stands when the team poses with a trophy. Yes, in some remote part of Dhoni’s brain, he knows it’s important to let players and the support staff share the limelight, but not because he is a leader. It’s because he sees himself as part of a team, a Whole. That is also why he often bats lower down the order. Because averages be damned, that’s what the team needs, regardless of what the media or we think.<br /><br />
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<li class="li3"><b>Perspective<br />
</b>"If 15 runs are needed off the last 6 balls, pressure is on the bowler and not on MS Dhoni”, said Ian Bishop. This is not because Dhoni is a hard hitter (well, partly it is). But it's because Dhoni has carefully analyzed the situation to let 15 runs remain in the last over. “My aim is to leave it till the bowler and me are on level ground, i.e. to the point at which he is under as much pressure as me. Then we see who can handle it”, he says.<br />
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Another example: “Everyone makes mistakes. It’s just that the distance between the mistakes is more in the case of successful people.” His perspectives on life let him look at it (life) objectively, and that is probably what enables him to imbibe all the qualities that we often talk about.</li>
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I could write about Dhoni’s qualities day and night. But for now, I’ll leave you with the 700+ words above and this poem written by Rudyard Kipling:</div>
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If you can keep your head when all about you </div>
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Are losing theirs and blaming it on you, </div>
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If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,</div>
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But make allowance for their doubting too; </div>
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If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,</div>
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Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,</div>
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Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,</div>
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And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:</div>
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If you can dream—and not make dreams your master; </div>
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If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim; </div>
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If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster</div>
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And treat those two impostors just the same; </div>
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If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken</div>
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Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,</div>
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Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,</div>
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And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:</div>
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If you can make one heap of all your winnings</div>
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And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,</div>
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And lose, and start again at your beginnings</div>
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And never breathe a word about your loss;</div>
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If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew</div>
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To serve your turn long after they are gone, </div>
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And so hold on when there is nothing in you</div>
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Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’</div>
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If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, </div>
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Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,</div>
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If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,</div>
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If all men count with you, but none too much;</div>
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If you can fill the unforgiving minute</div>
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With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run, </div>
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Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it, </div>
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And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!</div>
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<b>IF - Rudyard Kipling</b></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-26114628951975323212015-09-30T19:55:00.002+05:302015-09-30T20:00:11.529+05:30Why Hypocrisy is Hurting Us Indians<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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By the time you read this, the dust must have settled on yet another outrage (I’m bored of them now). Mark Zuckerberg changed his profile photo on Facebook to include the Indian flag, a gesture to support the Digital India Campaign. It made us feel good - after all, Facebook doesn’t do something for a country every day. So many of us joined in. And then some jealous Congees or AAPTards probably saw the mention of <a href="http://internet.org/"><span class="s2">internet.org</span></a> in the code, and declared that Facebook was using it to show our support towards their cause. Immediately, our sense of righteousness kicked in, and as <a href="http://rachnaparmar.com/" target="_blank">Rachna Parmar</a> said, everyone became a coder. We saw as many people posting status updates about the ‘perils’ of the display photos as the people who updated their photos. Facebook had to <a href="http://www.firstpost.com/world/facebook-admits-mistake-by-an-engineer-seeks-to-end-storm-over-digital-india-support-2448854.html" target="_blank">come out with a clarification</a> stating that there was absolutely no correlation between <a href="http://internet.org/"><span class="s2">internet.org</span></a> and the Digital India Campaign. Of course, none of the ‘righteous’ people will listen - after all, they know better than everyone else, isn’t it? The fact that they haven’t achieved anything in life except a new level of complaining and cribbing is a different story.</div>
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<span class="s1">So where does hypocrisy feature here? After all, these <i>adarshis</i> are standing for something they believe in, however stupid, right? Not quite. I’m willing to wager a bet that if Facebook does launch internet.org, or Airtel launches Airtel Zero, these righteous folks will flock to use it just like everyone else. Their justification? “See, I said it was wrong. But if everyone is using it, why shouldn’t I?” Flimsy, isn’t it? You see, people who portray themselves as righteous and moralistic on public platforms like social media and mainstream media, don’t really have a spine. The honest ones don’t need to make a show of it. They quietly go around doing their work, making small invisible changes which contribute to something big. And then every critic joins in to take the credit.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Imagine the laugh that Facebook’s employees (and the world) had at our IQs. Then again, this is not the first time that hypocrisy has hurt us Indians, has it?</span></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Hypocrites be like....</td></tr>
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<span class="s1">Let’s start with our desire to eradicate poverty from our country. We have been solid supporters of socialism and despised capitalism since the days of Nehru. Socialism implies that production, distribution and exchange should be regulated by the community (or country) as a whole. You know people who proudly strut around calling themselves Marxists? They’re socialists. On the other hand, capitalism is a system where trade and industry are controlled by private owners for profit. Nehru taught his whole generation that ‘profit’ was a dirty word, that people who make money are greedy and should be looked down on. Think about the disdain you feel when you say the word ‘marwari’. After becoming Prime Minister, Nehru declared that everything would be under the government’s control, and placed uneducated people in bureaucratic bodies to ‘grow' of our economy. While Nehru was busy having a gala time, his bureaucrats who knew nothing about business were taking decisions to approve (or reject - mostly reject) proposals from businessmen. Those years bled our coffers dry repeatedly. And Nehru staunchly defended the losses stating that a government should not be accountable to anyone, and that it is not in power to make profit. We were so enamored by his ideologies that we fell for the hook, line and sinker. Not only that, we passed those thoughts down to all generations believing that socialism was the way forward, and that businessmen were greedy. What we failed to comprehend was that greed is an innate tendency of man. So when we should have encouraged businesses to flourish, which would create countless jobs and independent cities like Jamshedpur, we let greedy illiterate bureaucrats ruin our country and fill their own pockets under the pretext of socialism.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Staying on Nehru, let’s talk about another case. While Nehru was PM, we frequently encountered famines. To the extent that we would import about 12 million metric tons of food grains from other countries, primarily from the US, to feed our people. However, when the US urged us to try becoming self sufficient in regards to food, we looked at them suspiciously and said that they wanted to stop us from advancing technologically. Yeah, right! Any Indian citizen who called the government’s attention to the need for improving conditions for agriculture was called an ‘American agent’ (ring any bells?). Nehru kept saying that it was shame how we, a country whose primary occupation was agriculture, could not feed our own people. He was all talk, no action. Just like the majority of us today. Nehru and his ‘trusted’ bureaucrats also chastised the US for the latter’s concepts of capitalism. Despite importing food grain from the US, we cozied with Russia. Guess whose wide-open arms that pushed the US into? Pakistan’s. Till date we’re ruing that mess.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I want to delve more into our hypocrisy. We say that we are supporters of art, and that we want up-and-coming artists to flourish. But in reality, we only like what is ‘big’ and ‘glamorous’. That’s why the senseless Khan movies rake up hundreds of crores in the first weekend, while true art movies get accolades from a few but lie unnoticed by the rest. The same holds true with sports (yes, here I am guilty too. I only watch cricket in Indian sports). This hypocrisy took its toll during the very formative years of our economy. Nehru’s bureaucrats (you can roll your eyes now) believed that steel and heavy machinery “had the highest correlation with national income in different countries.” So, with the help of loans from foreign governments (we were socialists remember? So no FDI), they set up three massive plants. But we still imported steel at a yearly cost of $200 million in the early ‘60s. It didn’t matter. The project was big, and glamorous. There was an alternate unglamorous view too. That we employ surplus labor to produce ‘wage goods’ like toys, clothes, shoes, snacks, etc. These low-capital, low-risk businesses would attract entrepreneurs for their quick return on investment, and laborers would consume the wages in buying these goods that they produced. Something on the lines of Henry Ford’s model. But this suggestion was scoffed at, and it stymied small innovation in our country which could lead to big changes, something that USA has done very well. Now you know why millions of Indians abandoned us for other countries. Now you know why the ‘brain drain’ occurs. “A little more realism and a lot more humility among our leaders might have helped in those days”, wrote Gurcharan Das in <a href="http://www.amazon.in/India-Unbound-Independence-Global-Information/dp/0143419250/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1443622736&sr=8-1&keywords=India+Unbound" target="_blank">India Unbound</a>.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">One last point. I wrote about the famines we experienced regularly. When Lal Bahadur Shastri became Prime Minister, he decided to address this problem. His trusted bureaucrats negotiated for months with other states and launched an ambitious (and risky) agricultural policy. They imported fertilizers and 16,000 metric tons of Lerma Rojo, a miracle wheat which kept soil fertile for longer, needed less attention and grew faster. The result? From being seen as a basket case of food, India became, as quoted by the official US hunger document in 1980, “the only developing country in the world which has built a solid system of food security.” We no longer encounter famines and sit on a surplus pile of food each year. The world applauded us while our own countrymen cried foul.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">But do you know where the biggest opposition to these policies, which only did good for India, came from? The media, and the Congress itself. The media wrote vehemently against these initiatives, calling them the ‘biggest sellout to America’. Academicians wrote extensively decrying these moves, and the Congressmen secretly kept hoping for a peasants' revolt, which never came. What came instead, much to the chagrin of critics, was the green revolution. So you see, everything that has ever done good for our country has been chastised by the media and us common folk since we are so heavily dependent on it. We are comfortable with complaining about things that don’t work, but are pushed out of our comfort zone when something unconventional is tried, and oppose it with everything we have.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I’m not saying Indians are bad people - okay, some of us are. This hypocrisy, which is deeply embedded in us, is not out of intent; it’s out of ignorance. We’re too ignorant (and lazy) to peel the layers and look for the real truth. For instance, the 'meat ban'. If someone does something which doesn’t auger well with our immature minds, we run to oppose it. When someone else does something else, we run like donkeys in that direction. And another. And another. We cannot wait before we judge, let alone considering alternate avenues for more information. We know <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/08/newspapers-are-cause-for-rise-in-crime.html" target="_blank">the media is shitting us</a>, but we will play along nonetheless. Look what we did to Maggi. And when it comes back, we will still eat it, won’t we? And don't even get me started on the <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/07/why-secularism-is-making-monkeys-out-of.html" target="_blank">'secularism' rhetoric</a>.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Are you looking for something to take away from this post? Well, there is none. Or wait, maybe there is. I’m asking (no, imploring) you to be driven by common sense and rationale for the sake of this country and yourself. Understand that there are more than 2 sides to every story. When we start looking at things objectively, maybe… just maybe… we will stop making fools of ourselves and this country will get onto the path of genuine inclusive progress.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-62517802401663673342015-09-20T08:39:00.000+05:302015-09-20T08:39:09.562+05:306 Ways to Bring More Power to Yourself<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">I remember the incident vividly - as if it occurred yesterday, though it occurred more than 7 years ago.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I was put in charge of a team as an ‘acting team leader’. Then came the announcement that I was made ‘acting floor supervisor’, and my team was handed over to someone else. It was not a promotion really; just a move to accommodate a team leader from another process.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">My (ex) team was shuffled. Some good people had been moved to other teams and some not-so-good ones had been added. I was enraged! This wasn’t fair! I walked up to Chandan, the person responsible, intent on giving him a piece of my mind. Thankfully, I started off by questioning his intentions rather than plunging into allegations right away.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Why do you worry, my friend?”, he asked. “It isn’t your team anymore.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Yes, but I have managed it for over three months now. So it is effectively my team, right?”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“No. It WAS your team. And you did a commendable job. For that, we will move you to a better process. What happens with this team now will reflect on the new team leader. He is known to be the reason many good employees have quit. Can we afford that?”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I hated Chandan, not for what he had done, but because he was right. Again. He had the ability to look at the bigger picture better than me. Often, his insights proved not just that he was right but how stubborn and pig-headed I was. What made me feel even worse was that he never rubbed it in. Chandan had the ability to look at events from a distance while I involved myself in them. He could analyze something dispassionately while I almost always let emotions get in the way.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Chandan gave me my first ever lesson in detachment.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Because of the hype surrounding spirituality today, detachment is often misunderstood as giving up what we possess and living like paupers. In reality, it is the state of distancing ourselves from an event or action and looking at it from a dispassionate perspective.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Becoming detached is tough. It takes practice, conditioning and will power. But the results are remarkable. Some of them are:</span></div>
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<ol style="text-align: left;">
<li style="text-align: justify;">It empowers you to pursue what you want</li>
<li style="text-align: justify;">It strengthens you to persevere for longer and pay less attention to haters</li>
<li style="text-align: justify;">It stops negative emotions from clouding your understanding of things</li>
<li style="text-align: justify;">It reduces your dependence on others and makes you respect yourself</li>
<li style="text-align: justify;">It calms you down. As a result, others feel calm in your presence.</li>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ljAicLy-Y7s/Vf4hulRTnLI/AAAAAAAACxM/7qBeW92DW5k/s1600/Empower-Yourself.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="302" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ljAicLy-Y7s/Vf4hulRTnLI/AAAAAAAACxM/7qBeW92DW5k/s400/Empower-Yourself.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image <a href="https://nickthecoach.wordpress.com/2013/09/24/week-2-of-self-empowerment-tips/" target="_blank">source</a></td></tr>
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<span class="s1">Being detached is an art. And like all arts, it takes time to master. Below are some ways that you can start developing this ability in you:</span></div>
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<b>“Does it tie in with my goal?”</b></div>
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Before asking yourself whether an action syncs with you goal, ask yourself - “Do I have a goal?” If the answer is “No”, you almost certainly will fail to develop the ability to detach. Why? Because you will chase everything, not knowing what is important and what isn’t. If you are working towards a goal however, then analyze every situation and action from it’s perspective. Does it fit in with what you eventually want to achieve? If yes, dive deeper. If no, cut away. This, my friend, frees up time to <a href="http://saiconnections.com/one-thought-that-will-pull-you-out-of-every-struggle/" target="_blank">do what you should</a>, rather than multitasking and being unproductive.</div>
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Not everything we want comes packaged the way we want it. Sometimes the best results come from some pretty sour experiences. Looking at these experiences objectively will help you peel the layers and find the good in them.</div>
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<b>Accept change</b></div>
<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Constantly observe all that comes through change, and habituate yourself to the thought that the nature of the Whole loves nothing so much as to change one form of existence into another, similar but new. All that exists is in a sense the seed of its successor.” - <a href="http://www.amazon.in/Meditations-Penguin-Classics-Marcus-Aurelius/dp/0140449337/" target="_blank">Marcus Aurelius</a>.</span></blockquote>
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Marcus Aurelius wrote this rule in around AD 175, but two centuries, later it still holds true. It also is most difficult for us to digest. We try to hold on to what we have through the skin of our teeth. We kick and scream helplessly like toddlers when it is taken away. No matter what you do, you cannot control the forces of Nature.</div>
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Rather than desperately holding on to what you have, develop the mental strength to accept change, and control how you respond to it. This will enhance your ability to detach from emotions which cause unhappiness.</div>
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</li>
<li><div style="text-align: justify;">
<b>You cannot control anything</b></div>
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Persistence and the <a href="https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/what-stops-you-from-being-successful-vishal-kataria" target="_blank">ability to handle uncertainty</a> are two traits which dictate how successful a person is. As mentioned in point #2, change is inherent in the functioning of Nature. And change brings uncertainty in droves.</div>
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Life is ten percent what happens to us and 90 percent how we respond to it. So if you think about it, nothing that you are trying to control is actually in your control. And what you feel is not in your control - your behavior, your reactions - actually is. We justify our negative reactions by saying “He started it”, or “How could they do this to me!” We want to control how life treats us, and not how we respond. But it actually works in the exact opposite way.</div>
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</li>
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<b>Remove judgement</b></div>
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Marcus Aurelius also wrote, “Remove the judgement and you have removed the thought ‘I am hurt”: remove the thought ‘I am hurt’ and the hurt itself is removed.”</div>
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Is this difficult to practice? You bet. Judgement comes easily to us, whether something impacts us or not. This is why we live <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/08/jasleen-kaur-incident.html" target="_blank">from outrage to outrage</a> today. Combat this judgement by looking at everything as it is - the plain truth, and subtract your interpretation of it.</div>
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MS Dhoni rarely, if ever, lets judgement or emotion cloud his understanding of the situation. “He goes into a match very blank, and then operates on instinct”, <a href="http://www.firstpost.com/sports/dhoni-goes-match-blank-operates-instincts-ashwin-2213684.html"><span class="s2">says R. Ashwin</span></a>. Dhoni has mastered detachment primarily because of his subtraction of judgement from a situation. He doesn’t rue over a bad umpiring decision or a spilled catch. Instead, he focuses on what to do at that moment to turn the tide in his favor. His ‘gambles’ pay off because he can see the plain truth in situations. And the results are there for us to see.</div>
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<b>Fight to reduce</b></div>
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“What gets freedom? Decluttering. Not just your house. But your body: make sure you’re healthy every day. Your emotions: spend time with people you love and who inspire you. Your mind: attempt to be creative every day. Creativity takes the mind away from anxieties. And spirituality: leave room each day for thoughts about the people you are grateful for, and thank whoever or whatever you hold dear, for the luck and fortune that you have”, writes renowned author and investor <a href="http://www.jamesaltucher.com/2012/03/ask-james-lying-politicians-freedom-being-introverted-the-big-bang-harry-potter-and-more/"><span class="s2">James Altucher</span></a>.</div>
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FOMO (fear of missing out) makes us do things that add to the clutter in life. Being online 24/7, trying to please everyone, buying things that you will not use… if you want mental peace, you need to throw these out of the window of your life.</div>
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Until a few years ago, I was the same. I did more than I could to please people, worked tirelessly to gain approval from those who were never happy, and just wanted more of everything. And you know what? I failed. Every single time. Then I got rid of the inessential - negative people, extra gadgets, an elaborate wardrobe, checking email every hour, and doing things to please others. Life is better now. I experience the FOMO lesser. It’s easier to go into switch-off mode and ignore things that would have impacted me deeply a few years ago.</div>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: large;">“It’s not the daily increase but the daily decrease. Hack away at the inessential.” - Bruce Lee</span></blockquote>
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<b>Live in the present</b></div>
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Many people want to forget the past. And many worry about the future. Will I forever be alone? Will I get the promotion or pay increment? Will I bag that lucrative client? Will I be welcome where I am going? Will others find out about an embarrassing incident that occurred in my life twenty years ago?</div>
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The fleeting second that just passed you by? It’s gone. And the future does not exist yet. You can do nothing about either. All you can do to stop worrying about them is to live in the present. This not only helps you give your current task your best, but also frees your mind from doubt and worry, leaving you happier.</div>
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<blockquote class="tr_bq" style="text-align: justify;">
<span style="font-size: large;">“Perform each action as if it were the last of your life, with unaffected dignity and precise analysis” - Marcus Aurelius.</span></blockquote>
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Meditation is an effective way to train your mind to live in the present. Meditation is not about chanting or taking God’s name a thousand times. It’s about getting in touch with yourself and learning to focus on the moment. Try apps like <a href="http://www.calm.com/" target="_blank">Calm</a> and <a href="http://www.omvana.com/" target="_blank">Omvana</a> and witness the difference in yourself after 21 days. Whatever ability I have developed to live in the moment, I’ve attained through mediation, and incessantly observing MS Dhoni.</div>
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</ol>
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<span class="s1">Detachment is an ongoing process. No matter how strong we are emotionally, our minds get sucked into the trap of negativity. We must keep training to look at the bright side and focus on what is important. I would like to believe that I have learned this art, but negativity drowns the voices of reason and common sense in my head many times even now. The secret is to not get discouraged, not give up, but pull yourself back to the present. Train yourself to master your mind rather than be mastered by it, and detachment becomes easier.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"></span><br /></div>
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<span class="s1">Why is detachment important according to you? And how do you try to imbibe this quality in yourself? I would love to hear from you.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-7539832183907209842015-08-29T19:32:00.000+05:302015-08-29T19:32:57.461+05:30Why We Loved Jasleen Kaur<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">By the time you read this, the dust will almost have settled on the Jasleen Kaur-Sarvajeet Singh incident. Mainstream media has already torn the guy to pieces, and social media has torn into the girl. People are bored now, and must be busy oiling their ‘outrage’ guns to point and shoot at someone else.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">When Jasleen posted about Sarvajeet Singh on Facebook, it didn't take long for the post to go viral. Yes, we supported Jasleen because she was (is) a girl. Apparently reality was exactly the opposite of what she posted. But this gender bias is not exclusive to India. I remember <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2015/02/15/magazine/how-one-stupid-tweet-ruined-justine-saccos-life.html" target="_blank">reading about an outrage</a> caused by a woman who tweeted about a guy. Apparently he cracked a sexist joke while sitting behind her at a tech conference. The joke was not aimed at any gender. It was something innocent and typical that guys would laugh over. But her tweet led to an outrage and cost the guy his job. He was married and had three children at that time.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Let’s look beyond this gender bias. There is a deeper layer. We stood in support of Jasleen for the same reason that we loved Rahul Dravid and Manmohan Singh. The same reason why, even now, there are many supporters of Arvind Kejriwal.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">They play the victim card.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-0CI9Cot7jMs/VeG7FdANhlI/AAAAAAAACwE/SY8cwCna-kE/s1600/Jasleen%2BKaur%2BOutrage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="186" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-0CI9Cot7jMs/VeG7FdANhlI/AAAAAAAACwE/SY8cwCna-kE/s400/Jasleen%2BKaur%2BOutrage.jpg" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Image courtesy: <a href="http://www.mensxp.com/" target="_blank">MensXP</a></td></tr>
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<span class="s1">See I think mediocrity and internal dissatisfaction are deeply rooted in us because of the way we are treated. Whether while travelling to work, or at our workplaces, we are constantly exposed to situations and people we don’t like, and feel disrespected. Somewhere, everyone of us has felt, or still feels, victimized. And when someone appears to be victimized, when we feel like the person is helpless, our protective instincts go into overdrive.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">We believed Dravid was a victim when Ganguly was dropped from the Indian squad after altercations with Greg Chappell. We believed Manmohan Singh was a victim when politicians around him indulged in scams that bled our country dry. We still believe Kejriwal is a victim because of his relentless rants of not having control of Delhi - who cares about the fact that he is busy plotting against the government rather than taking care of his own constituency! We believed Jasleen was a victim because she said that she was harassed by the boy. Arnab Goswami went insane (went?), India outraged (#FightBackIndia), and a police case was lodged against the boy. Well done outragers. And this is precisely why leaders like <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/04/dhoni-modi-similarities.html" target="_blank">Narendra Modi and MS Dhoni</a> have countless haters… because they stand for what they believe in, and refuse to answer for their actions to idiots. They refuse to be victims, and that makes us uncomfortable.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Do we know the real story before we outrage? Do we think about the possible repercussions on people before slinging mud on them? Haven’t we shamelessly forwarded WhatsApp jokes like ‘God Bless Sunny Leone’ when Abdul Kalam died, or during the bomb blast in Bangkok, or the crash of MH370? What gives us the right to point fingers at someone else and demand that they be punished? What gives us the right demand that people get scarred for life? </span></div>
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<span class="s1">The media simply sensationalizes these cases for ratings. And we, who have nothing better to do than peek into others’ lives, play along, living our days one outrage after another. All this while the media laughs its way to the bank, politicians quietly indulge in hopelessly immoral acts, and real issues lie suppressed and unaddressed.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that we must ignore issues. But there is a difference between an outrage and a protest. In the former, we simply say slanderous things and call for punishment of those whom WE consider guilty. In the latter, we step out of our houses, leave our phones behind, and do something that makes the relevant people sit up and take notice.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">If you want to place your faith in people, place it in those who work quietly, rather than those who keep complaining, or leading outrages, or Cinderellas waiting to be rescued. Remember the proverb you learnt in school: ‘Empty vessels make the most noise’? Maybe our teachers were preparing us for today so that we could behave like mature individuals rather than play ball with people who whip out the victim card more than Arnab Goswami says “The nation wants to know.” Start by looking at your own life and improving it. Reduce looking at the lives of others. Stop whining. Do things that <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/05/what-is-purpose-of-your-life.html" target="_blank">make you happy</a>. You will find that you don’t have the time or patience to participate in outrages. Gradually, you will prefer keeping whiners at a fair distance. And yes, choose your role models carefully. Make a poor choice and you never know when you will wind up at the wrong end of the outrage trend.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I was deeply disturbed when people started sharing the video where a TimesNow journo misbehaved with Sarvajeet Singh. But I was heartened by his courage when he didn’t back down and stayed calm throughout. And gradually, I was also heartened by the fact that websites and people were critical of the appalling behavior of the journalist. Just like the tech conference incident mentioned above, where the woman got a fair bit of flak too, people fought back here, showing that good sense does prevail sometimes.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Jasleen, if you are reading this post, I want to ask you one question: Are you a bully? And you, dear reader, I want to know what you are going to do to stop siding with those who demand sympathy and choose to look at both sides of a story.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-772195919611855712015-08-25T08:53:00.002+05:302015-08-25T21:10:01.969+05:30Thank You Indigo Airlines<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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It’s appalling how businesses treat their customers these days. Ponzi sites, <a href="http://skift.com/2015/08/10/travel-brands-stop-hate-selling-to-your-customers/" target="_blank">hate-selling</a>, shoddy after-sales service - we see and read about them every day. Social media is rife with so many complaints that it appears businesses look at customers simply as tools to make money.</div>
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<span class="s1">Often however, employees or brands take amazing care of their customers and try to bring smiles on their faces. But we rarely hear about those instances. Negativity has been so deeply ingrained in us by <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/08/newspapers-are-cause-for-rise-in-crime.html" target="_blank">the media</a> that everything positive is seen as ‘expected’ and trifling matters often get perceived as negative and are blown out of proportion. The positive experiences are forgotten. Well, not always. Rachna wrote about <a href="http://www.rachnaparmar.com/2015/08/spread-happiness-and-love-with-saythanks.html" target="_blank">an awesome initiative</a>, and I am writing about another. This post is to thank <a href="http://goindigo.in/" target="_blank">Indigo Airlines</a> for the exceptional care that they took of my 92-year-old grandmother.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Granny was staying with us since the past 6 months, and wanted to go back home to Varanasi. She had never travelled by plane, and it was one of her wishes. So mom and I booked tickets on Indigo Airlines. Granny and I would fly on 19th August on flight 6E 578. I didn't book a wheelchair or airplane seats online; I always do that at the airport. But the sound pasting I got from mom left me somewhat unnerved. Until we entered the airport, I thought that it would have been better if I had sorted everything while booking tickets itself. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">How wrong I was! As soon as we entered the airport, someone from the Indigo team - Gaurav - rushed to me and asked if granny required a wheelchair. “Okay, this should sort things somewhat”, I thought as I said she did. Little did I know that he and his team were just about to make this a stroll in the park for us. I asked him to help her onto the wheelchair while I waited in line to check in. No need, he said, and took me to an empty counter. I asked the lady who was checking our luggage in for seats in the 12th row so that granny would get more leg room. But wheelchair-bound people aren’t allotted those seats since that’s where the emergency exit is. Instead, the lady suggested that she would allot us seats in the second row, and if the flight was empty, granny and I could sit in the first row, which offers ample leg space too. I am sad that I forgot her name. In fact, I interacted with so many people that I’m feeling pretty sucky about not having noted their names so that I could include them in this post.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DtV7h24SLbY/VdveZPhEkVI/AAAAAAAACu0/8oyY36CUiO8/s1600/Indigo-Airlines-Review.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DtV7h24SLbY/VdveZPhEkVI/AAAAAAAACu0/8oyY36CUiO8/s320/Indigo-Airlines-Review.jpg" width="237" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Right before getting onto the plane</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Gaurav wheeled granny right to gate number 9 and informed the ground staff about her. They kept a watch on her while I brought tea. A crew member took her to the bathroom right before our flight arrived. Another ensured that she got on to the bus headed for our flight before everyone else. He wheeled her up the ramp right till the entrance of the plane. And even before I could take a good look at the faces of the pretty air hostesses, they had offered the first row seats to granny and me. Even melted butter cannot slide as smoothly as things were here.</div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QCUk2s-1EVg/VdvelJTgOGI/AAAAAAAACu8/HQ1vfF6n7_Q/s1600/Indigo-Airlines-Flight.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QCUk2s-1EVg/VdvelJTgOGI/AAAAAAAACu8/HQ1vfF6n7_Q/s320/Indigo-Airlines-Flight.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Selfie clicked on granny's request</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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<span class="s1">The flight was comfortable. It’s unbelievable how fearless my granny is. Not once did she flinch when the plane took off. And she was totally at home when we were airborne. Looking outside the window, studying the air hostesses… time flew by for her.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Granny is quite a fit woman for her age and often complains that we don’t let her walk enough. So when we were alighting, I thought we could walk to the taxi stand. But the air hostess said that she had radioed for a wheelchair, and it arrived before she completed her sentence. Again, granny was wheeled right out till the taxi stand, and the Indigo staff member stood with us in the sweltering 2:00 pm heat of Varanasi until a taxi came along. I loaded our luggage in it and helped granny sit. The man quietly folded the chair, shook my outstretched hand and walked back to the airport to do his duty.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Not once did even one person grimace, let alone complain. Not once did anyone ask for money (although I tipped everyone who helped). What appeared extraordinary to me because of the ease with which it was done, was regular for them. How many businesses take such good care of their customers?</span></div>
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I don't need to harp on concepts of <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2012/06/interaction-with-vodafone-customer.html" target="_blank">customer service</a> here, do I? Neither do I need to analyze what they did right and what they could have done etc. I just want to leave you with the feelings of warmth and genuineness that the crew of the airline displayed.</div>
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<span class="s1">Dear Indigo Airlines, you have made a loyalist out of me. I don’t fly often, but whenever I do, I’ll fly with you. You guys may be setting high standards for yourself in customer satisfaction, but what you do is far more than that. It is service to mankind. Each member who was part of the team of flight 6E 578 on which PNR O7VYZ7 flew made the first flight of a 92-year-old woman a delight. You treated her like a queen. Here is a heartfelt thank you from my entire family.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com62tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-48733075734416560402015-08-23T16:30:00.000+05:302015-08-23T16:30:44.495+05:30Will Indiblogger's BNLF Prove Disruptive?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">I started blogging early in 2011, way later than most. Just like you, it was on a whim. I started writing, but didn’t know how to make more people read it? A friend suggested that like most bloggers, I should go to others’ blog posts, leave comments and interact with bloggers. “Okay”, I said. “But how am I going to find good blogs to begin with.” “Simple”, said the friend. “Register on Indiblogger.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“What’s that?”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“Register first. You will figure the rest out yourself.”</span></div>
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<span class="s1">What lovely advice it turned out to be! Within a few weeks of registering, I was addicted. I spent hours interacting on the chat forum, reading people’s blog posts, leaving comments on the ones I liked and promoting them. As a result, my traffic saw a spike, and I got in touch with amazing bloggers. The IB (Indiblogger, not Imperial Blue) platform provided me with the foundation to get more visibility on my blog. But it also taught me the most important lesson - to get meaningful interactions, I had to build relations with the right bloggers.</span></div>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TNtxQH4oAh4/VdmnL6pavvI/AAAAAAAACuk/cH7An5ofUeQ/s1600/Indiblogger%2BBNLF.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="390" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-TNtxQH4oAh4/VdmnL6pavvI/AAAAAAAACuk/cH7An5ofUeQ/s400/Indiblogger%2BBNLF.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">image <a href="https://www.indiblogger.in/bnlf/" target="_blank">Source</a></td></tr>
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<span class="s1">Which is why I am excited about the Blog Now, Live Forever event being organized by IB. One doesn’t often get to hear (or read) about blogging conferences being held in this part of the world (let alone international speakers coming over). Often we read about such events with high profile speakers held in US, and are left thinking “when will something like that come here?” Indian blogging is still in its adolescence, where most bloggers still do not understand the significance of creating content for users, and promoting it effectively. I interact with many bloggers, and one thing noticeable is the lacking understanding of building relations and an outreach. “I write for myself, not others. Whoever is interested will come and read”, is a popular belief. And then they complain about barely getting traffic (let alone shares or comments) on their blog. Guest posting, content distribution, relationship building etc. are terms that we bloggers despise as much as we despise corruption.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">This is where the BNLF event will prove disruptive. With speakers like Bruce Dickinson (Up the Irons!), Jeff Bullas, Christoph Trappe and Arnab Ray (astute viewers of the content creation and sharing scenes globally) sharing their experiences and insights, it will stimulate many bloggers to evolve. I also look forward to hearing Kanan Gill, whose insights on adding humor and story telling to one’s content can improve its quality in leaps and bounds, will prove invaluable. Mind you, keeping audience in peels of laughter for 8-12 minutes when our attention span is less than 8 seconds today is no mean feat.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Of course, apart from listening to globally renowned bloggers, the highlight will be seeing Bruce Dickinson live again, this time on a different platform. The last (and only) time I got the chance was when Iron Maiden came to Mumbai, and I had stood in the second row from 3 (they hit the stage at 8:30 that night). I had to hold myself from weeping when Bruce ran on stage and started singing ‘Aces High’. I hope I can contain my emotions this time around too. “Your time will come”, sang Bruce in The Wickerman. I hope that my time to see him again has come. IB holds the key to this hope.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">But let’s leave my personal fandom of Bruce behind and get back to the blogosphere. If you are a blogger, or are even looking to pursue a career in social media, the BNLF event sounds like a wonderful event to not only hear renowned speakers, but also meet popular bloggers and pick their brains (worth its weight in gold). I will be going. Hope to see you there.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-15949663814857024532015-08-16T08:54:00.001+05:302015-08-16T08:56:29.299+05:30Where You Lost the Plot of Life<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">“Oh, he always had my hairdryer in his hand”, my friend’s mother said. “As a child, he was always singing. My hairdryer was his mic, his dad’s expensive goggles and my scarf were his costume, and he was a rockstar. Jumping around to his father’s rock music collection,” she beamed, as we flipped through the family album (yes, some of us still have them).</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Today, he spends 14 hours a day working in a software firm. No weekends, no family time, dismal pay hikes…</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“What happened”, I asked. “Life”, she sighed.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Forget what we wanted to be as children. We all still want to be someone. And I have used the word ‘all’ here because every person, regardless of who she is or what she does, aspires to be someone or something. We want to live on our own terms, recognition from the world for having done something amazing, and the adulation of people around us. What stops us? Guilt.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Guilt of not being able to give our family the comfort they deserve if we dive into something new. Guilt of not being able to make enough money for our family to roam in malls on weekends and buy things that they don’t need. No more fancy phones for our children and partners for a while. No more feeding them junk food every week. Today, this is as good as poverty… no - starving.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">What we love doing is certainly not worth the risk, is it? Now we have a family to take care of, which depends on us to bring home the bread (and smartphones, and iPads). Our duty is to take care of our family, and ensure that our children fulfill the dreams that we couldn’t.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Where did this guilt come from? Surely we were not taught to think about family and money from childhood! This guilt came from social pressure, from the status quo. We had dreams to pilot airplanes or land on the moon some day. Then society mellowed us down. It said that we were fools to think of something that was ‘impossible’ (we learnt this word when we integrated ourselves with society). It instilled the fear of being ostracized if we didn’t toe in line. Our job was to study hard, get a job, earn money and feed our families. We had to fit the frame that society made for us. If we stuck out by even a few inches, we were looked down on, and brought shame onto our families. This is what brought about the guilt.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Gradually, we lost our mojo. We believed the liars, the insecure ‘leaders’, the people who made the rules so we would toe in line. And boy, did we toe in quickly! We looked around for acknowledgement, which we never received. Because no matter what we did, society always demanded more. We gave our families all that we could, but we never really gave them true freedom, because we never had it ourselves. Life sucked, and then we died.</span><br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"Whatcha lookin at, hater?"</td></tr>
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<span class="s1">And then there were the other kind. The kind whom we considered arrogant and stubborn. The kind whom we found too weird to play with us, to be a part of this well-knit society. The kind who were probably pulled up by their teachers in front of the classroom, and whom we (and our parents) sniggered about. The kind who couldn’t stay put at a job long enough.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">They went on to do something remarkable. No. I’m not talking about scoring good marks in academics or being model students. They went on to become someone we always wanted (but never deserved) to be. Envy made us turn greener than a chilly. Surely they must have done something wrong… surely they just got lucky or found someone who did everything for them.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">No. They believed in what they wanted to do. Despite the world telling them that it wouldn’t work, that they were fools, that it has been tried before and all others had failed. They soaked up whatever the world had to say and continued working. In the process, they became masters at handling pressure and criticism. They stopped watching the news and <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/08/newspapers-are-cause-for-rise-in-crime.html" target="_blank">reading newspapers</a>. They could weed out the sense from truckloads of bullshit and learnt to back themselves even when the whole world counted them out. They believed in the outcome, and that they would eventually prevail. Life eventually gave up trying to pin them down and hoisted them on its broad shoulders. They achieved true freedom - from the shackles of society, from stereotypes, and monotony. They never truly succeeded in being free of fear - every person still faces fear in her life. But they mastered the art of facing it head-on and destroying it before it caused damage.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I had attended a 'Go-Diamond' event organized for the people of Amway (I worked for a company which organized these events). There, a Diamond (someone at the top of the Amway chain) shared an experience. When his wife and he moved to USA, they had little money. They had to choose between 2 apartments: one without a balcony, and the other with a balcony which had a rent of just $5 more each month. The Diamond convinced his wife to choose the one without the balcony, because that meant they had $60 each year to spare for Amway products. She agreed. They worked hard together. Today they own a palatial house, never think about budgets, and serve as role models to hundred thousands of people the world over.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">You can take flak from society and family in the initial years while you work towards doing what you love. Or you can remain unhappy the rest of your life sucking up to people that you despise. In the first case, you can use the four magical words: At least I tried. In the second, you still will use four words, but they will sound like: If I had tried.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Which life do you want to live? The choice is yours.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I have resolved to pursue real personal freedom. Freedom from what people say, from being conned by the media, from being a slave to my mind. And I intend on making the most of this journey from fear to freedom. Care to join me?</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-92036251789280540222015-08-04T12:11:00.002+05:302015-08-05T20:25:18.430+05:30How a Butterfly's Wings Caused a Hurricane in My Life<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">I was 18. I had fared poorly in Std. XII and somehow got admission into an Engineering college because my parents wanted me to. I understood nothing - maths, BEE, mechanical engineering, engineering drawing… even computer science. I flunked miserably (13 out of 16 subjects in the first 2 sems). If this was how I would fare in the first year (which is the easiest), what was I going to do in the coming years. More importantly, how would I complete the first year? Something unfortunate had happened in my personal life that compounded my bad mood. Each day I woke up hating the world, hating myself, and feeling invisible.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">That’s when, one afternoon, in our college library, Huzefa introduced me to Metallica. The album in his walkman (yup, it was a cassette) was ‘Symphony and Metallica I’. I liked what I heard. And then Master of Puppets blew my mind. In the days when Enrique and Britney dominated the charts, here was some music that I liked. I bought some cassettes. My friends started sharing their MP3 collections, through which I got all of Metallica’s albums. And I loved them! I was also introduced to Iron Maiden, Judas Priest, Black Sabbath and Guns N’ Roses. And then, I wanted to play guitar.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Huzefa had a guitar, and he didn’t play it. So he lent it to me. I kept playing the guitar for about 8-10 hours a day (when I should have been studying for my KT papers). Then I met some pro musicians trying to put together a rock band. They offered me the role of a bassist. I was ecstatic. My mom wasn’t. She said “If you want a bass guitar, either clear your papers or buy it yourself.” I wasn't going to clear even 1 paper, let alone 13. So I did something that horrified everyone in my family. At the age of 19, I quit engineering and started working at a call centre. With my first pay, I bought a bass guitar and amp. Huzefa was there with me again. Unfortunately the band disbanded even before they could play a show.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Until I was 18, people said that I behaved like a 10-year-old. Within a few months of turning 19, people said that I sounded like a 25-year-old. I will never know how it happened, but am glad it did. I kept achieving at work, which started repairing my damaged self-image. I got promoted, changed jobs, got rejected by girls I really liked, made stupid decisions, failed, succeeded, laughed, cried, rose, sank... I really lived. Life tested me, and each time I came out stronger. Whenever it punched me off my feet, I got up before the count of 10. Sometimes at 9 1/2, but always before 10. Today I look forward to life more than I have in the last 31 years. I hope the only time I won't get up before the count of 10 is when I am dead.</span></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/--IYiq6pOVCw/VcBd5c7XjjI/AAAAAAAACso/vAk1_o0vni0/s1600/Metallica.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/--IYiq6pOVCw/VcBd5c7XjjI/AAAAAAAACso/vAk1_o0vni0/s640/Metallica.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1">All this time, I never stopped listening to Metallica and watching their videos (I’d watch them on CD initially because we still had dial up internet and YouTube didn’t exist). I was captivated by James Hetfield’s (Metallica’s frontman) stage presence. He stood at 6’2”, broad shouldered, blue eyed, blond hair and a trademark mullet, holding a black guitar, the first button of his black shirt always open. He ruled the stage like a Alexander ruled the world. Undisputed dominance. I wanted to play guitar like him, to have a stage presence like him, I wanted to be like him. My pseudo name (we have to use them in call centers) was James - spelt ‘Jaymz’ because that’s how Hetfield spelt his. Hetfield was my hero during the most troublesome years. He kept me going long after I felt like I didn’t have any strength left.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Today is James Hetfield’s birthday. Happy birthday rockstar! God knows how many lives you have touched and made a difference in. I don't know why but the last 14 years of my life are flashing in front of me today. If it wasn't for you, who knows where the f**k I would be rotting.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Huzefa is no more. It’s been over 4 years now. Every year, on his birthday, I post a message on Facebook and hope that wherever he is, he is happy. He introduced me to Hetfield. He was the only person who encouraged me to stay true to my dreams when all others thought I was crazy. Maybe I was, and Huzefa was too. It takes one crazy man to recognize another. Heard of the Butterfly Effect, a principle in the Chaos Theory? The effect states that a butterfly flapping its wings in New Mexico can lead to a hurricane in China. A small change in one state of a deterministic non-linear system can result in large differences in a later state. Huzefa, with his walkman, that afternoon in the library, was a butterfly who flapped his wings. He unknowingly helped me evolve as person, helped me find my true calling. He set the wheels in motion in my life. R.I.P. Hufu. Return If Possible.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: x-small;">image courtesy: <a href="http://www.metallica.com/" target="_blank">Metallica</a></span></span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-49877811107769438802015-07-23T19:01:00.002+05:302015-08-08T09:49:54.581+05:30Why 'Secularism' is making Monkeys Out of Us<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1"><i><u>Disclaimer:</u> This post is not aimed at any religion or people of specific beliefs. It is aimed at those pseudo-secularists who consider themselves ‘vigilantes’ and ‘protectors of justice’.</i></span></div>
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<span class="s1">In a particularly popular experiment, some scientists put 3 monkeys in a cage. The cage also had a ladder. A bunch of bananas was tied to the celling of the cage. The monkeys could get to it once they climbed the ladder. The catch, however, was that every time a monkey was within touching distance of the bananas, the scientists induced a shock (a controlled shock. Animal activists please don’t wet your pants). Eventually, the monkeys decided that it was wise to not reach for the bananas.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The scientists then added a new monkey to the cage. The first thing it tried was to climb the ladder (duh! Bananas!). But no sooner did the monkey start climbing than it was beaten by the others. Every time the monkey tried to climb the ladder it got whacked. Eventually it stopped trying too. None of the monkeys ever reached for the bananas though the scientists had stopped inducing the shock.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">After a few days, the 3 monkeys who were a part of the experiment when it began, were replaced with a new one. This is where things got interesting. Though the monkey which was already in the cage didn't know about the shock, it continued beating the one who tried climbing the ladder. This continued for every monkey who was put in the cage. No monkey was allowed to climb the ladder, but none of them knew why. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">If you guessed that we are the monkeys, the media and politicians are the scientists, and the current ideologies of ‘secularism’ are the bananas, you’ve got it right.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">What is your understanding of secularism? I’m guessing it is inclusive living, where every religion has the right to justice, equality and a dignified life. (Leave a comment if I am wrong). <a href="http://www.sanskritimagazine.com/india/hindu-is-a-coward/"><span class="s2">Sanskriti magazine</span></a> puts it well:</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>“Secularism in India is not an empty slogan or mere cosmetic - it is the very basis of Hindu beliefs and that is why a common Hindu is still ashamed of Babri Masjid demolition (sic) while a Muslim - of Hindu ancestry - has no qualms or shame of the destruction of tens of thousands of Hindu temples by Muslim invaders.”</i></span></span></blockquote>
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<span class="s1">However, this… this current environment is not inclusive living. It is divisive politics. We have become so immune to divisive politics that if ‘minorities’ don't get additional benefits over the majority, we call it anti-secular. We beat each monkey who thinks about challenging the status quo. Why? Because it’s been like this for 60 years of the Congress rule. And we have survived. So this is the only way.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Think this is over-the-top? Think I’m being irrational? Well, let’s look at some scenarios.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Madrasas in Maharashtra don’t teach English, math or science. It wouldn’t be rocket science to imagine their version of history (please point out if I’m wrong with solid proof). The State government still pumps in ₹100 crore each year into these schools, and talks of modernizing the madrasas are always on-going. But when the State government says that madrasas which don’t teach formal subjects cannot be deemed schools</span> (understandably), it leads to an outrage. Define logic.</div>
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<span class="s1">Over 50 lakh imams have been paid their salaries from the government of India since 1994. Forget Hindu priests getting the same benefit, it is reported that the Karunanidhi-led DMK government swindled about 200 kg of gold in gold-plating vimanas and golden chariots schemes in various temples. Reports also say that while the annual earning of the Tirupathi temple is over ₹3,500 crore, only about 15 percent is used for the development of the temple. The remaining funds are diverted by the State government (which comprises mostly of Hindus) to non-Hindu purposes, leaving Hindu priests poorly paid and pilgrims poorly taken care of. (<a href="http://organiser.org/Encyc/2011/10/24/Secular-loot-and-plunder-of-Hindu-temples%EF%BB%BF.aspx?NB=&lang=4&m1=&m2=&p1=&p2=&p3=&p4="><span class="s2">source</span></a>)</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Let’s take another news which has been in the public eye for too long: Church vandalism. We repeatedly read about how churches are being vandalized, and how the minority Christians are feeling unprotected under the current government. Six specific incidents of church attacks were reported in the media. But <a href="http://www.firstpost.com/india/crying-wolf-the-narrative-of-the-delhi-church-attacks-flies-in-the-face-of-facts-2101105.html" target="_blank">upon investigation</a>, the following facts came out; facts which were barely mentioned in main stream media: In one incident a group of kids playing outside threw stones and one shattered the church's window pane (how communal today’s kids are!). Another incident, where a church was ‘set on fire’, was the result of a short circuit. Yet another reported incident where a small group of men allegedly vandalized a church turned out to be a drunken dare. And the fourth was a case of genuine burglary with no communal angle. Speaking of burglaries, while 3 churches (out of about 200 in Delhi) were robbed in 2014, 206 temples, 14 mosques and 30 gurdwaras were burgled in the same period. Does this really have a communal angle to it? Well, if you are one of those pseudo-secularist left-wingers, everything has a communal angle to it.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Let’s also consider the ever-controversial subject of conversion of religion. We have heard of instances of <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love_Jihad"><span class="s2">Love Jihad</span></a>, or how <a href="http://www.quora.com/What-do-Christians-do-to-convince-Hindus-to-convert-into-Christianity"><span class="s2">Hindus convert to Christianity</span></a> for monetary benefits, but never in the media (if this ever is published in mainstream media, it’s in some remote corner of a boring financial news section). But immediately after the BJP government came into power, news of <i>ghar-wapsi</i> started making the headlines, and the pseudo-secularists, led by the Congress, demanded that this be addressed. Arun Jaitley, Rajnath Singh and Amit Shah said that they were <a href="http://indianexpress.com/article/india/politics/conversion-row-modi-govt-dares-so-called-secular-opposition-to-support-anti-conversion-law/" target="_blank">ready to graft an anti-conversion bill</a>, and requested the opposition’s cooperation on it. Since then, all the opposition parties have been silent. Only we are screaming about it, saying that the current government is trying to make this a pro-Hindutva country, like <a href="https://www.facebook.com/atul.mongia.7/posts/10153074447088214?fref=nf"><span class="s2">this Facebook status update</span></a>. The work of the scientists (read politicians and media) is done. Now they just have to sit back and laugh while we monkeys continue whacking each other.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Compare this with the absence of news on alleged atrocities against Hindus in Mallapuram and other locations in India.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Current governments dole out loads of cash to minorities to make life ‘easier for them’. In many states, minority girls belonging to the lower economic strata <a href="http://www.deccanherald.com/content/363475/minority-girls-get-rs-50k.html" target="_blank">get ₹50,000 each</a> for their marriage. In UP, <a href="http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/Akhilesh-government-woos-Muslims-Distributes-money-for-girls-marriage-promises-reservation-for-boys/articleshow/17572258.cms" target="_blank">Akhilesh Yadav has allotted</a> ₹30,000 for every 10th pass Muslim girl to study further, and has created reservations for Muslims in government jobs and educational institutes. Good. But what wrong have Hindus done to not deserve this ‘princely’ treatment? Why are there no calls for equality now?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Another question that begs to be asked: Are Muslim girls better off with the money provided for their marriages? Do these cash handouts reach them in the first place? I don’t know. But I know one thing. Regardless of these doles, the poor end up right back in the hellhole which they want to leave. Only political parties and religious governing bodies get richer. We, on the other hand, applaud their generosity and 'secularist mindset' without knowing whether it actually is beneficial. And if someone challenges this notion, we verbally beat the daylights out of the person. Well done monkeys. Are these your ideas of ‘secularism’ and ‘democracy’?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Yes, Hindus have been more tolerant by nature for centuries. This is probably why Gandhi said “Hindu is a coward and Muslim is a bully.” I don’t agree. In fact, I don’t agree with a lot of things Gandhi said or did. Muslims, Christians, and people of all religious faiths are accommodative, and they love this country which they live in. But I am surprised about how restricted our understanding of secularism is. I’m surprised about how we feel that the ‘Hindutva’ government is doing everything in its power to hurt minorities, but turn a blind eye to the plight of the vast majority at the hands of some misguided groups.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The current government is driven by rationale. Yes, by now you have figured that I am a Modi supporter. Yes, the government makes mistakes and some policies may prove counter productive. And it is good to question them and keep them on their toes. But stop looking at every thing from a ‘secularist’ perspective and start looking for development from a country’s perspective. Stop being a monkey and start being a sensible human.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">If you genuinely want to promote secularism, look at yourself as an Indian first. Stop thinking of yourself as a Hindi, Muslim, Sikh, Christian, Malayali, Tamil, etc. Support governments which aim to empower people of all religions to live with dignity, rather than on handouts. This dignity comes with growth for all sections in the country. This growth occurs through more jobs, a business-friendly environment and better infrastructure. People will earn more, send their children to better schools, and improve their lifestyles. All this will help our country progress. Look for information in the right avenues, not what mainstream media is feeding you. It <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/08/newspapers-are-cause-for-rise-in-crime.html" target="_blank">does what it does</a> to make money. And then it laughs its way to the bank while we foolishly scream and outrage.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I love my country and countrymen. They’re “my brothers and sisters”, (except the one who marries me). I respect every religion and people’s rights to follow it. As citizens of a secularist country, it is our duty to accommodate and empower every religion to live by its philosophies. But that doesn’t mean that I will give you my other cheek if you slap me on one. It doesn't mean that I believe the crap when perpetrators portray themselves as the victims. I have matured. It’s time you do too.</span></div>
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<span class="s1"><span style="font-size: x-small;">image courtesy: <a href="http://images.google.com/" target="_blank">Google Images</a></span></span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-4615339493391504342015-07-16T14:32:00.000+05:302015-07-16T18:16:10.159+05:30What it Really Takes to Achieve Long Lasting Success<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Admiral Jim Stockdale was the highest-ranking United States military officer to be imprisoned during the Vietnam war. He was held prisoner for 8 long years without any rights, release date, or certainty about whether he would survive. Upon release, Admiral Stockdale was awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Jim Collins, author of the bestselling book <a href="http://www.amazon.in/Good-Great-Some-Companies-Others/dp/0712676090/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1437038014&sr=8-1&keywords=good+to+great+by+jim+collins" target="_blank">Good to Great</a>, met Stockdale after that. Collins asked him how he survived. “I never lost faith in the story. I never doubted that I would not only get out and prevail in the end but also convert this experience into a defining event of my life”, he said. The next obvious question followed: “Who didn’t make it out?” The answer to the question was as unexpected as snowfall in summer. “The optimists”, answered Stockdale. “They kept saying that we would be out by Christmas. Christmas then became Easter, which became Thanksgiving, and then it would be Christmas again.” The optimists died of broken hearts more than physical torture.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Optimism - the hope that things will get better - is a trait which all human beings possess. What differentiates us is how long we can hold on to it. There are 2 kinds of optimists:</span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: decimal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The vast majority who expect things to get better instantly and give up when they don’t. Such people often blame the environment, conditions or other people for their failure, without realizing that they either needed to change their perspective or were remarkably close to success when they gave up.</span></div>
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<li dir="ltr" style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; list-style-type: decimal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;"><div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The almost-negligible minority who possess eternal optimism and eventually succeed. They live by the quote: “Everything is okay in the end. If it is not okay, it isn’t the end.” These people persevere with a goal until they achieve it, no matter what.</span></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">But merely possessing the optimism that you will eventually prevail is not enough. You must be able to face the hard, brutal facts, and do something about it. Admiral Stockdale possessed these traits in abundance. He confronted the fact that he wouldn’t make it out of incarceration by simply waiting to be released. So he shouldered command and did everything he could to increase the number of prisoners who would survive the ordeal without breaking down mentally. He realized that no one can face torture indefinitely, and devised step-wise systems to ensure that the men had something to look forward to. For instance, saying certain things after x minutes to a person being tortured, an internal communication system to reduce the sense of isolation among prisoners that the captors were trying to induce. Stockdale and his men followed these systems with military-esque discipline (no pun intended).</span></div>
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<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Ehlb0hzxXH4/VadyqV9SIaI/AAAAAAAACr4/RAWNBpj85N0/s1600/Jim%2BStockdale.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Ehlb0hzxXH4/VadyqV9SIaI/AAAAAAAACr4/RAWNBpj85N0/s320/Jim%2BStockdale.jpg" width="236" /></a></div>
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<div dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.38; margin-bottom: 0pt; margin-top: 0pt; text-align: justify;">
<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">There is nothing wrong in being an optimist. In fact, possessing this trait is commendable. But expecting things to magically fall in place is where most people often mess things up. Do you know how many people have quit, and how many companies have failed because they refused to acknowledge what they saw in the mirror and lacked the discipline to fix it? Yes, you need discipline. Discipline is not following a strict routine; it is doing things that matter consistently till you achieve the desired results.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Let me relate a personal experience with you. I own a <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2011/11/my-yamaha-rd-350s-restoration.html" target="_blank">Yamaha RD350</a>, which also happens to be MS Dhoni’s favorite motorbike. It was in rickety shape when I bought it. I gave it to a mechanic who promised to restore it back to its glory days. To cut a long story short, he fleeced me of a lot of money and left the bike worse off. He also turned a good friend against me. Another friend, who also owns a similar bike, advised me to sell it and go for something more modern. At that time, I underwent a surgery, and lost out on a potential promotion as a result. My whole world was crumbling. I cried for days. But I resolved that I would fix both the bike and my friendship, no matter what it took. For a year, I asked people for help with the bike, but nothing moved. Then, I met an unassuming mechanic who said that he was leaving Mumbai for good in 3 weeks. He surveyed the bike and said that he could fix some urgent issues, and that I could take care of the rest gradually. But getting the other work done from someone I didn’t know could land me in the same soup again. I was faced with two choices. I could either let him finish the difficult part and then find someone else to restore the bike cosmetically. Or I could push the limits and get everything done in 3 weeks. For three weeks that followed, my schedule was: work from 3:30 am - 12:30 pm (I worked at a call centre then), have lunch and leave by 2 with the mechanic to buy parts, return by 5 and work with him on the bike till 9:30 at night, sleep by 11 and wake up by 2:30 to get ready for work. After 3 weeks, when I unveiled the bike to my friends, the sheer admiration in their eyes when they rode it was the icing on the cake. The cake, of course, was that I had a gorgeous-looking beast in my garage which was the envy of many boys and men in the locality. And oh! Everything eventually worked out with the friend with whom my relation was strained. To this day, we remain good friends. </span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I don’t mean to brag, but I displayed each of the important traits for those 3 weeks: the belief that I would eventually prevail, facing the brutal facts, and self-discipline. If I achieved all this in 3 weeks, imagine what you can do in 3 years!</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">I hope you realize that there is a lot more that goes into being successful than what self-help books prescribe. Being likable, having a good posture, maintaining eye contact, speaking well etc. are all fine. But what you really need to do to be respected and successful is to excel at something. And to excel, you have to work your ass off. You have to face the truth, however harsh it may be, possess remarkable self-discipline to do the right thing at the right time, and believe that you will eventually prevail.</span></div>
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<span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-family: Arial; font-size: 14.666666666666666px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">What are your thoughts on this? I would love to hear from you.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-17422421001825719052015-06-29T12:48:00.002+05:302015-06-29T12:48:16.397+05:30Why Smart People Play Their Cards Close to their Chests<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">Smart and successful people have been playing their cards close to their chests (and breasts) since centuries. Why? I’ll tell you why. But first, let’s talk about some incidents.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Something was nagging me. I discussed the case with a friend. I was just looking for <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2012/10/please-just-listen.html" target="_blank">someone to hear me out</a>. I had barely spoken for half a minute when he interrupted, “See, I don’t know much about this, but here’s my advice.” “I don’t want it!”, I wanted to scream. Apparently I didn’t, and my face didn’t betray my mood either, because he carried on talking while I dreamt about visiting Iceland.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Another time, I wanted to try something adventurous. I shared my thoughts with someone I know - I want to call her a friend but the incident left me wondering. “Bad, bad idea! You’re bat shit crazy!”, she disapproved. Discouraged and feeling rather low, I proceeded regardless, expecting little from it. The response, however, was the opposite. It was better than what I expected even before speaking to her.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">On both instances, when I got something off my chest, I wished I had shut my mouth instead. And these aren’t isolated cases (how I wish!). They frequently occur in daily life. I’ve suggested some brilliant ideas in my previous companies (yeah, I’m bragging) only to get responses drier than a dead leaf. And when I tried to justify the ideas, or push them forth with conviction, people said that I was being defensive. Maybe I was. Who am I, <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/05/what-is-purpose-of-your-life.html" target="_blank">the Dalai Lama</a> to nonchalantly smile while people trounce my ideas and thoughts?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I’ll bet my life’s savings on you having experienced similar emotions too. Many times…</span></div>
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<span class="s1">So, why do most people either pull you down or start giving you unsolicited advice, despite meaning well? It’s the feeling of self-importance. People like to plug themselves into every damn conversation and situation. “What would I have done in such a case?”, they think. And they respond without considering that your and their circumstances are different, or that you didn’t ask for their advice. And in case you did ask, they either believe that you will fail or are gripped by sheer jealousy because maybe… just maybe… you may succeed.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“People love you when you’re average. It makes them comfortable. But when you pursue greatness, it makes people uncomfortable. Be prepared to lose some people on your journey”, said Tony A. Gaskins Jr. So damn true. Now you get why people who achieve more often speak little in public?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">People who speak less don’t have highly classified, CIA-type plans. Instead, they share those with a few trusted people. This eliminates the pretentious concept of ‘democracy’ where many people state unwelcome opinions and nothing is achieved. Instead, the smart folk put their plans into action, and when those yield good results, the world commends them saying that it knew that they always had it in them. <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/04/dhoni-modi-similarities.html" target="_blank">MS Dhoni and Narendra Modi</a> come to mind.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">But the discomfort caused by people telling them what to do is not the only reason smart people play their cards close to their chest. Here’s one instance when I shot myself in the foot by being too honest.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I shared a unique thought on a topic for an assignment during college with a friend. He went on to tell the teacher the idea, as if it was his all along. So he created a good impression in her mind (in those days that was important to us), while I was left introducing my forehead to the wall repeatedly.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">You get the drift. And again, I’ll bet my life’s savings.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The world has enough people who will take whatever you say or do and twist it to benefit themselves. It is also full of people who will support you in your pursuits and stand by your side rather than ‘advice’ you on what to do at every step. It’s important to find the latter and only have those people surround you. In <a href="http://jamesaltucher.quora.com/How-To-Be-Mentally-Strong-1" target="_blank">this amazing infographic</a>, James Altucher states that most successful artists, businesspeople, performers and the likes have surrounded themselves with people who have supported them in their ventures - something that played an indispensable role in them achieving success.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">So think before you speak. Take your time before opening up to someone and sharing your beliefs and secrets with them. Be decisive with what you share. Test the waters before you dive into it headlong. Share your deepest thoughts and concerns with a select few who encourage you to do what you intend to. And until you find such people, be tenacious and silent. It not only saves you emotional distress of but also makes you resolute. People may call you stubborn and rude, but you can simply shrug and walk away, knowing that these are the very people who will suck up to you when you succeed.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I can count the number of people I trust on the fingertips of one hand. What about you? Whom do you trust? And why? I would love to hear from you.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-36170399516287452982015-06-10T18:00:00.000+05:302015-06-10T18:17:56.443+05:30Even The Myanmar Attack Can’t Make Us Less Indian<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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I’m happy. In a hitherto unheard instance, the Indian Army entered Myanmar and avenged the loss of their brothers. Army officials stated that about 100 insurgents were killed and there has been no counter from them so far. Neither the media nor the terrorists’ intelligence sources saw this coming. The operation was covert, carried out in cooperation with the Myanmar government, and has made us Indians feel proud and secure. A lot of credit for this goes to <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2015/05/narendra-modi-foreign-visits.html"><span class="s2">Narendra Modi’s foreign visit policy</span></a>.</div>
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<span class="s1">Apparently I am not alone. Millions of other Indians are happy too. Twitter and WhatsApp are filled with updates on how proud the army has made us feel. Some friends and I were discussing this on a WhatsApp group. And then, one of them wrote “Myanmar is okay, Pakistan is different. It’s like the difference between nuke and a hand grenade.” In short, he implied that the army will only have proved its mettle if it attacks Pakistan.</span></div>
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<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uvtX-GNz9lI/VXgtLzAfbYI/AAAAAAAACq8/gAGPlHCvDG8/s1600/Indian-Army-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="myanmar attack Indian army" border="0" height="325" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uvtX-GNz9lI/VXgtLzAfbYI/AAAAAAAACq8/gAGPlHCvDG8/s400/Indian-Army-2.jpg" title="The Indian Army Which Attacked Insurgents in Myanmar" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1">At first, I was livid. I seethed for about an hour. Then, my anger turned to pity. It reminded me of my younger days. Once I had scored 60 out of 75 in Algebra. Just once! I was so happy that I mentally was announcing it to the world from atop Mount Everest. Mom, however, thought differently. “Good”, she said “but what was the highest score?” Experience had taught me that when it came to studies, every time my mother said “good”, it was followed with a “but”. And my mom wasn’t the only person, was she? No. Indian parents have a reputation to uphold, and by not doing this, they are probably letting themselves down. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">It’s not just Indian parents who indulge in comparison. This sort of behavior and thinking reflects an Indian resident’s lifestyle. <a href="http://www.firstpost.com/living/india-is-less-happy-than-pakistan-palestine-says-world-happiness-report-whats-going-on-2288076.html"><span class="s2">Indians are unhappier than Pakistanis</span></a>. Can you believe that! We’re more frustrated than Pakistan, though everything we have is a hundred-fold more than them.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I think that globalization has made us Indians take what we have for granted. Nothing is enough, and that’s why Amazon’s <i>Aur dikhao</i> (show me more) resonates so much with us. The outburst of things to possess has driven us insane. If we don’t have more than the person beside us, we have failed (or so we are <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2011/11/indias-new-generation-impatient.html"><span class="s2">made to believe</span></a>). We have become slaves to the media. Traits like appreciation, gratitude and contentment are just good for talks in a <i>satsangh</i>: ironic, considering that our scriptures teach more contentment and less desire. It reflects even in our conversations. Talk to someone about something you did or intend on doing, and they instantly plug themselves into the conversation. <a href="http://even%20the%20myanmar%20attack%20can%E2%80%99t%20make%20us%20less%20indians/" target="_blank">Comparisons begin</a>, advice is doled out without asking, you’re often made aware of ‘how wrong’ you are… it’s all about how you stack up against them.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">It’s time to evolve beyond the conventional mindset that has been a part of us for decades. Stop comparing events and people. Appreciate unconditionally, and be happy for what you have. Silently thank God (or your stars, if you are an atheist) for small things that you are fortunate to receive. And quit saying that your life is f*cked and you don’t have anything to be thankful for. If you can read this post, it alone means that you are more fortunate than 75 percent of the world’s population. If you earn 5 figures monthly, you are more fortunate than 90 percent of India’s population. If you have an iPhone, you are more fortunate than me ;)</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Practicing appreciation is not difficult. This is not about appreciating the Indian army or the Modi government (though you should). Appreciate small things that people do, or their feelings when they share some thoughts with you. Quit undermining someone’s accomplishments by comparing them with yours. Be <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2012/01/best-thing-in-life-is.html"><span class="s2">grateful for family and friends</span></a>, learn to live with less, and witness your own life <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/05/what-is-purpose-of-your-life.html"><span class="s2">become happier</span></a>. And since you influence those closest to you, you will spread happiness in their lives too. Now isn’t that something worth living for!</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com51tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-2091421872013117802015-05-21T15:48:00.000+05:302015-05-21T15:48:31.014+05:30Does Modi Need to Go On Foreign Visits So Frequently?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">“The previous PM was on Silent Mode. The current PM is on Flight Mode.” You must have read this message a hundred times by now, right? Narendra Modi has visited 17 countries in his first year, and the ‘tours’ just don’t seem to end. Someone had cracked a joke about how empty Modi’s passport was at this time last year.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">So what is this <i>showbaazi</i> about? Senior journalist Renu Mittal slammed every move of Narendra Modi lately (surprise surprise?) and said that Modi is doing what every other Prime Minister has done. In fact, she believes that since he has 4 more years in the office, he should space out his visits and focus more on work within India. Well, she exemplifies the ignorance in a lot journalists these days - something that led to them being tagged ‘presstitutes’ and <a href="https://twitter.com/search?q=%23GoHomeIndianMedia&src=typd" target="_blank">#GoHomeIndianMedia</a> trending in Nepal and India.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Let’s leave our emotions out of the picture and think objectively about Narendra Modi’s foreign visits for some time.</span></div>
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<a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9LoA0NwZy44/VV2vVwFjb2I/AAAAAAAACqM/S-hc68wz4MQ/s1600/Modi-Foreign-Trips.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img alt="narendra modi foreign trips" border="0" height="150" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9LoA0NwZy44/VV2vVwFjb2I/AAAAAAAACqM/S-hc68wz4MQ/s400/Modi-Foreign-Trips.jpg" title="narendra modi foreign trips" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span class="s1">Narendra Modi’s visit to Australia was the first by an Indian Prime Minister in 28 years. His visit left Russia and USA feeling somewhat queazy because of some policy agreements, most importantly a nuclear deal and landmark framework for security cooperation. India will now receive a substantial supply of uranium and collaborate with Australia in generating cleaner energy. This should, to an extent, put a tab on the bullying behavior of USA, and increase the bargaining power of India. Modi also pushed for making a resolve to ‘isolate those who harbor terrorists” and called for a “closer security cooperation, but, even more a policy of no distinction between terrorist groups or discrimination between nations’. The aim is to make India safer from Chinese and Pakistani insurgency.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Closer home, Modi has visited many Asian countries like Bhutan, Sri Lanka, Nepal, Myanmar, Mongolia, China and South Korea. Come on! These are countries that we common folk visit on a vacation, right? (I hope you don’t mind being called common folk - anyway it’s Hindi translation is <i>aam aadmi</i>.) Why does a Prime Minister have to visit them instead of taking care of your and my petty problems here? Well, here are some points to ponder on.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">The Prime Minister is forming good relations with neighbors, thus securing the borders of India from Chinese and Pakistani infiltration. Also, until recently, India was seen as a marketplace of a vast population, where multi-national corporations could sell their wares and make lots of money. Modi is now making India <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/09/make-in-india.html" target="_blank">an investment centre</a>. This will help in technology transfer (you MBAs surely know what it means. If you don’t, because you watch TimesNow and read ToI-let paper, you might have to Google it). It will also increase the number of jobs and reduce our current <a href="http://www.investopedia.com/terms/t/trade_deficit.asp"><span class="s2">trade deficit</span></a> because we will import lesser non-essential goods and instead, manufacture them here, and maybe even export them. The Rafale deal is a significant one because India has not had modern fighter aircrafts since the last 17 years, as pointed out by our defense minister Manohar Parrikar. Developed nations like Australia, France, Germany, USA and South Korea have agreed to invest in India. Apart from Australia, Mongolia (which no Indian PM had ever visited before) and Canada have agreed to supply India with uranium to meet the target of <a href="http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/industry/energy/power/government-aims-to-add-10000-mw-per-year-to-lift-wind-energy-sector/articleshow/40079023.cms"><span class="s2">10,000 MW of hydropower generation</span></a> each year, which will make India less dependent on costly fuel imports. Apart from saving us time spent outraging when petrol prices rises, this will also save us an enormous amount of money and provide sustainable energy to millions of people who don't have access to it.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">During his visit to China, Modi exhorted the politicians, civilians, and even students to think about the their hostility towards India. He also pointed out that <a href="http://www.dnaindia.com/money/report-india-might-increase-import-duty-to-curb-china-s-steel-dumping-2074381"><span class="s2">China’s steel dumping in India</span></a> was not ethical, something the Chinese leaders acknowledged and promised to address. Would these have been possible without a Prime Minister as dynamic and steadfast as Narendra Modi? Plus, there are talks about positive steps to work together on railway and other projects to improve the infrastructure of India.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">So you see? The 3 key aims of Modi through these foreign visits are:</span></div>
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<li style="text-align: justify;">Secure India’s borders</li>
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<span class="s1">If you want someone to help you, you have to reach out to them and offer them something first. The law of reciprocation kicks in and the person in front helps you achieve what you need. Common knowledge, isn’t it? And it holds true not only for you and me, but politicians and bureaucrats too. And this is exactly what Modi is doing.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Critics say that Modi is doing the same thing done during UPA II - i.e. no talks with Pakistan. However, India has always measured the effectiveness of foreign talks on the basis of interactions with Pakistan, USA and, to an extent, Russia. Should we continue with age old redundant policies or look to implement new and effective ones? It’s time for you to decide. Do you want to live in an India which progresses in leaps and bounds in the coming years? Where people have jobs and the quality of life of billions is better than today? Or would you prefer living in one where you still keep promoting ‘secularism’ and decrying corruption while the world passes you by?</span></div>
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<span class="s1">“I have never seen any leader as rapturously received in Australia as PM Modi”, said Tony Abbott. Modi received stellar welcomes in USA, Canada, Europe, Japan and other countries too. We, his own countrymen, however fail to recognize the hope that he brings, and rant about money and time being wasted on these trips. Now this post is not to tell you to start supporting Modi - if you despise him, you won’t see the light even if it is shining right in your face. And if you are a Modi supporter like I am, you don’t need to be convinced about the progress and development that India can achieve in the next 4 (hopefully 9) years.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8964215896987873803.post-76127642631142842362015-04-30T20:36:00.000+05:302015-05-01T15:29:22.624+05:3010 Similarities Between Dhoni and Modi<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span class="s1">Despite being <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2014/02/what-ipl-is-doing-for-indian-cricket.html"><span class="s2">anti-IPL</span></a>, I have been following it a lot this season, partly because I want to rally behind our players who couldn’t win the World Cup. Sounds lame, doesn’t it? But hey, I’m being honest with you here.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">A couple of weeks ago was my 32nd birthday. I was thinking of keeping celebrations low-key and chilling at home. Chennai Super Kings were playing Mumbai Indians at the Wankhede stadium and I was going to watch it at home (you can figure out my birth date now). Instead, <a href="http://www.ramyanarayanan.com/"><span class="s2">Ramya</span></a> got tickets for the Sachin Tendulkar Stand. Thanks to her, I finally saw Mahendra Singh Dhoni live in action.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">If you know me (or have read my posts), you know that I am a huuuuge MS Dhoni fan. More than his powerful hitting and habit of winning, I admire his philosophies on life. I <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2013/09/an-ode-to-all-teachers-on-teachers-day.html"><span class="s2">consider him as Dhonicharya</span></a> and myself as Eklavya, though I haven’t learnt enough from him yet.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">Dhoni was his typical self in the match - calm, composed and unhurried. It was mind-blowing to see the number of CSK supporters in a stadium in Mumbai, until Dhoni came out to bat. It then hit me like a bullet in the chest. They were all Dhoni fans! While screaming “Dhoni, Dhoni” with thousand others that night, I felt like I had seen this somewhere else. Oh yes, I had seen it on TV. A lot! Only instead of “Dhoni, Dhoni”, people were chanting “Modi, Modi”.</span></div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DLE-yZDX4Dk/VUI_hh6BEAI/AAAAAAAACpU/xu-fv5icg80/s1600/Modi-Dhoni.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Dhoni and Modi" border="0" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DLE-yZDX4Dk/VUI_hh6BEAI/AAAAAAAACpU/xu-fv5icg80/s1600/Modi-Dhoni.jpg" height="201" title="Narendra Modi MS Dhoni" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The similarities are striking</td></tr>
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<span class="s1">I thought about it on the way back. Are Dhoni and Modi similar? My heart and brain emphatically said “Yes! In more respects than one.” And when your heart and brain agree on something, you really want to talk about it! So I thought of listing 10 similarities between the two veterans in their respective fields.<br />
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<b>Both carry the hopes of 1.2 billion countrymen on their shoulders</b></div>
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One thing that unites India is cricket. And one thing that divides India is politics. Events in both of them impact the entire country massively. Being the captain of the Indian cricket team places a colossal burden on Dhoni’s shoulders, just like being the Prime Minister of India does to Modi. The entire nation’s hopes rest on them. But why do we have high hopes of them? Well, read point number 2.</div>
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<b>Both possess unwavering self-belief</b></div>
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As long as Dhoni is at the crease, any target, however distant, looks achievable. Remember the last time we felt like this? Yes, it was during the Sachin Tendulkar era. Similarly, when Modi galvanizes himself and his team into action, we are left inspired almost always. Remember the wave of delight across the country when the BJP won a landslide victory in the 2014 Elections? How do these 2 real life superheroes make us believe in them? How have they been so effective in what they do? It’s because they believe in themselves. They back their abilities, and deliver more often than not. And since others see in us what what see in ourselves, people believe in Dhoni and Modi too. Their sheer presence exudes a certain charisma and gives us hope - the only emotion stronger than fear.</div>
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<b>Both have brilliant perspectives on things</b></div>
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Yet another commonality between Dhoni and Modi is their enviable intelligence. This intelligence stems from years of mental and physical training, empowering them to have a brilliant perspective on things. They are astute students of life, possessing the ability to look beyond the present and chart out plans to handle situations before they even arise.<br />
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For instance, <a href="http://www.mediacrooks.com/2014/10/why-modi-wont-leave-it-to-no10.html"><span class="s2">here is how</span></a> Modi meticulously plans every action of a strategy down to the last detail. And Dhoni… well, he says “People generally have Plan B to fall back on. I have Plans B, C and D.” Unbelievable!</div>
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<b>Yet, both are massively misunderstood</b></div>
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<a href="http://oliveremberton.com/2014/if-youre-not-pissing-someone-off-you-probably-arent-doing-anything-important/"><span class="s2">In this post</span></a>, Oliver Emberton has beautifully explained that the more you impact people’s lives, the more they will misunderstand you. Since 2.4 billion eyes (and a lot of foreign ones) are watching both Dhoni and Modi closely, every move they make is scrutinized and dissected. And then there are us Indians. The more the world applauds one of our own for being unconventional, the more more we hurl insults at him (APJ Kalam is an exception to this rule, thankfully!). Someone who doesn’t tell us what his intent is, becomes an antagonist. Thankfully, both Modi and Dhoni keep away from the limelight. This saves them time that would otherwise be wasted in explaining their actions to people who won’t listen anyway. How they do it? How do they soak up this pressure and still be retain their amazing attitudes? The next point answers these questions.</div>
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<b>Both have mastered the art of detachment</b></div>
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The Bhagavad Gita preaches about performing action without attachment towards fruit. But how many of us can follow it? Well, Dhoni and Modi are two living beings who do so every single day. "If tomorrow he has to say goodbye to all the trappings of fame, Dhoni will calmly get on his motorbike and go away. He is that rarity who treats both those impostors - wins and losses - in the same way. He simply plays the game”, said Sunil Gavaskar.</div>
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We have read unlimited articles and posts about Modi’s simple and austere lifestyle also. The sheer dignity with which our Prime Minister conducts himself despite what people say about him shows what he thinks of critics. I would love Modi to have 2 more terms as India’s Prime Minister. But if he doesn’t, I’m sure that he will still be at peace, knowing that he gave it his all. Such remarkable clarity of thought and ability to endure cannot be accomplished without detachment - from others’ opinions about them, materialistic pleasure, results and everything else.</div>
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<b>Both aim to serve Mother India</b></div>
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It’s amply clear from the Indian Prime Minister’s and cricket captain's interviews and speeches that their prime goal is to serve their nation. <span class="s2">For Dhoni</span>, his <a href="http://www.wisdenindia.com/cricket-article/country-parents-wife-dhonis-priority-list/124887" target="_blank">country comes above everything else</a>, even above his parents. Narendra Modi has dedicated his entire life to serving his nation, including <a href="https://youtu.be/wMvgeVsly2o"><span class="s2">valiant actions that we don’t know about</span></a> to keep India united.</div>
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<b>Both distrust the media</b></div>
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It’s no secret that both Modi and Dhoni distrust the media. By now we’re familiar with Modi’s aversion to mainstream media. Thousands of media journos beg for an interview with him, but he and his cabinet air their views only on Doordarshan and All India Radio. And he has substantially reduced the size of the entourage of the press traveling overseas with a Prime Minister, which has pissed off many journos who now write and talk horse shit about him frequently.</div>
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Similarly, Dhoni has instructed the Indian cricket team not to speak to the media. He has shown what he thinks about the media on multiple instances. When asked about his retirement plans recently, Dhoni said “The media should conduct a thorough research, come up with conclusions and write the exact opposite, because that will be the truth.” On another occasion, when Dhoni was asked whether a rumor about the Indian team’s dressing room would be spread, he said “Newspapers like Times of India will do that for us. So I won't bother.” And I’m a sucker for people who don’t trust mainstream media.</div>
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<b>Both give credit where it's due and prefer avoiding the limelight</b></div>
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The Indian cricket team is called ‘Dhoni’s boys’. The current Indian government is called ‘the Modi government’. However, rarely, if ever, do we see either of these evolved souls taking centre stage and hogging the limelight. When India wins a trophy, Dhoni is generally invisible in the team photo, often standing with the support staff in the second row. When a good budget is announced or good policies are implemented, Modi is nowhere in the limelight either. He stealthily goes about his work to make India a better place to live in for you and me. Did you see <a href="https://twitter.com/narendramodi/status/592581039886733312"><span class="s2">his response to #ThankYouPM</span></a>?</div>
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<b>Both live in the present</b></div>
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There is no denying that Dhoni and Modi work with the future in mind. They have to. However, they both possess the remarkable trait of living in the present moment. I have never seen Dhoni fuss about the future - he simply focuses on the current ball of the current over in the current match. Rahul Dravid says, “He has a unique ability to ignore consequences and soak up pressure. This makes it easier for everyone else. He is calm and measured. Win, lose, he can walk away.” And when he is off the field, he simply <a href="http://www.thecricketmonthly.com/story/762745/the-star-we-don-t-know" target="_blank">switches off from cricket</a> and enjoys life outside.</div>
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Modi is no different. Yes, he thinks a lot about our future (as he should), but he works in the present. You don’t need to be a rocket scientist to figure out that he asks himself “What can I do now to improve our country’s future?”, and works accordingly. The last time developmental work was carried out at such furious pace was 1991. Instead of dreaming about our ideal future, Modi prefers to act in the present. And living the current moment to its fullest is the mark of a great human being.</div>
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<b>Yet, we choose to learn from neither</b></div>
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Both Dhoni and Modi have infinite lessons to teach us; lessons which will make us better human beings. Yet, we refuse to learn from them and instead carry on with our mundane and hollow lives. It’s like we fear the consequences of living like them. But trust me, life is much better when you emulate Dhoni and Modi. The shackles fall off and you no longer feel like singing “I want to break free” because you already have broken free.</div>
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<span class="s1">Each of us comes in this world to serve a purpose. I think that God sent Dhoni and Modi to inspire millions of us, apart from excelling in their fields. And boy, do they serve their purposes well or what! I hope that someday, I get to meet them and learn more about the core philosophies that govern their lives. If I can be 10 percent as honest, as genuine and as driven as either of them, <a href="http://alwaysarocker.blogspot.in/2013/09/an-ode-to-all-teachers-on-teachers-day.html"><span class="s2">my life’s purpose</span></a> will be accomplished.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">I’m sure that you can point many more similarities between them which are not listed here. Why not share them in comments? And for heaven’s sake, keep them positive. There is enough negativity in this world, so you don’t need to contribute to it.</span></div>
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Vishal Katariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08171798388180255475noreply@blogger.com16